Up Chuck

Don't Get The Wrong Idea

2011-04-19T23:10:00.000-07:00

Did you miss me?

It has come to my attention that it may have been a few days since I last posted. On the off chance that anybody still checks this blog, I thought I'd give a little update on my life.

As you may recall (if you can't, just read the last couple of posts) mommy finally had surgery on her tummy about 15 months ago. She responded well to the surgery and was able to start eating, etc. on her own. By spring-time she was doing so well that all of my grandma's were able to go home.

So, mommy had me all to herself over the summer and, accept when she made us dress like twins, we had a pretty good time.

One of our favorite things to do was exercise.

However, mommy was having a hard time getting off her immune suppressants, so they decided to try a new treatment. Unfortunately, they had already taken out the port in mommy's chest, so they had to put in a new one. But this time they put it under her skin so she wouldn't have those dangly things dangling around. So, now they just stick a special needle right into her chest when ever they need to access her juices.

So, mommy started going to the hospital once a week where they would hook her up to a machine that pulled her blood out, radiated it, then pumped it back in. Each treatment lasted about six hours. (She is still getting them weekly).

Meanwhile, it was quite the busy time for the rest of the family. Try and keep up, we're going to move fast here.

My sister Amelia turned 8, and Amelia's sister, Clara, turned 12.

Clara went to her first girls camp (notice the can of air freshener on her cot), we had a family reunion at Zion's National Park, and my sisters got jobs as power line workers.

Mommy turned 24 again, I roasted my first marshmallow, and Clara's science fair project established the ineffectiveness of coconut oil and raw eggs to regrow hair.

By the end of the summer we were all pretty pooped out....

...except for Clara, who was interested in Tae Kwan Do just long enough to get her yellow belt, and my dad, who started making lamps out of junk he found at the thrift store.

Because mommy has a policy of not going more than a few months without a complication, she decided to develop a foot problem in the fall. It all started when I accidentally stepped on her foot during a BYU football game. She ended up in the ER the next day, but they couldn't quite figure out what was causing all the pain in her foot.They thought maybe it was a fracture, but it turned out to be celulitis.

About the time they finally figured out what was going on with her foot, mommy ended up back in the hospital with another bowel obstruction. This time they had to open her all the way up and untangle her innards.

Meanwhile, I turned 3. The colored pile of goo with a candle in it is supposed to be a big bowl of Mini-Wheats. The day only got worse when the new car my Grandpa Lopez promised me turned out to be a bit smaller than I expected. I still don't see what is so funny about crushing a boy's dream.

Halloween just brought more evidence that my dad needs a hobby.

And who says those 8 years getting his undergrad in film were wasted?

As winter came, mommy ended up in the hospital a couple more times with random tummy issues and illnesses. In fact she ended up having a third bowel obstruction and another surgery. But, she was able to be home for the most part. She even helped me a little bit with Christmas dinner. Speaking of Christmas, Lola hooked me up with an awesome train set.

Mommy wasn't the only one spending time in doctor's offices. Clara got braces, Amelia had her tonsils removed...

...and I got my teeth flossed by a lady with blue hands and a shriveled heart.

This winter we also learned what was causing mommy so much pain in her joints. It seems that some of the medicines caused bone infarcts in the ends of nearly all her bones. This is one of her knees.

That squiggly patch that looks like North America on the top bone is the part of the bone that died from lack of blood flow. She has the same problem in her ankles, hips, elbows, and wrists.

Speaking of infarcts, I finally learned to stopped soiling my drawers. Match box cars weren't enough to motivate me, but if you sit on the toilet with an Ipad long enough, the plumbing is bound to start working eventually.

Just after Christmas daddy took out a second mortgage and paid to have Amelia's hair straightened. It is still straight now, but will go back to curly this summer when she starts swimming.

Another side effect of the steroids mommy has been taking is increased pressure in her eyes. A few weeks ago she learned that the pressure in her right eye has permanently damaged her optic nerve and she's lost about 30% of her vision in that eye.

Don't worry, that's not mommy's actual nerve. Her's is still connected. On a more positive note, I've found that if I stay on mommy's right side and tip-toe quietly, any time is snack time.

Apparently mommy's immune system got tired of snacking on her nuget center, so it moved on to the chocolatey shell. She has developed scleroderma. That is where the connective tissue between her skin and muscles hardens like a rock. I guess you know you're in pain when you stick your parts in hot wax to make them feel better. It seems to help for a little while.

She also goes to physical therapy a couple of times a week where they give her deep tissue massages and wrap her in heat packs.

Well, there you have it. That's what has been going on in my life for the past year-plus. Apparently it was a little too boring for Grandma and Grandpa Wahlquist, so they decided to head to Bucharest Romania for an 18 month mission. They left this week. I'm sure they will miss me terribly.

Maybe by the time they get home I will have found the inspiration I need to do another blog post.

Until then...

Turning The Corner....Slowly.

2010-01-26T19:26:00.000-08:00

Unless the mistake is eating oxtail....

...and chasing it down with some Gisadong Bagoong (sauteed shrimp paste)...

...after not eating anything of substance for 10 months and having two feet of your small intestines cut out a week earlier. Then the mistake can last a good 3 or 4 days and pretty much shut down all traffic flow, if you know what I mean.

Butt, I think that is behind us now and mommy is ready to start the ride again.

Speaking of which, here's what's happened in the last couple of weeks since the surgery:

1) Mommy doesn't get any more IV feedings (GOOD).

2) They stopped the nasty CMV medicine (GOOD).

3) Mommy got dehydrated and collapsed on her tailbone on the bathroom tile again (BAD), but the x-rays were negative (GOOD).

4) They switched her steroid from IV to a pill with the hope of stopping it completely in the next few weeks (GOOD).

5) Mommy doesn't take any more morphine for pain (GOOD).

6) I got time-out for trying to cram a toy dinosaur up my sister's nose, allegedly (BAD).

Overall, things are going pretty well. The best part is that each night after my tubby, mommy puts me in my jammies and reads me stories.

I like the one about the intrepid cowboy, wandering the lawless expanse of the family room while sharing an apple with his trusty steed and keeping an eye out for unwary maidens in need of a dinosaur rhino-routing.

Yippie-kie-ay!

Enough is Enough!

2010-01-11T23:16:00.000-08:00

Apparently mommy was getting a little carried away with her flatulant exploits, so they kicked her out of the hospital and sent her home today.

"Breaking" News!

2010-01-10T16:21:00.000-08:00

We interrupt your regularly scheduled, productivity wasting, cheating your boss out of valuable work time, Internet surfing session to bring you this important announcement.

At approximately noon (MDT), on Sunday, mommy tooted!

Yeah Mommy! That means the plumbing is working! So, she rewarded herself with half of a grilled cheese sandwich.

So far there haven't been any signs of infection or other complications. We'll find out more tomorrow about when she might be able to come home.

Good job mommy!

The Most Important Question You Have To Answer Before Surgery

2010-01-05T20:28:00.000-08:00

Mommy got to the hospital this morning at 6:00am for her surgery. Over the next two hours she was visited by nearly everyone in the hospital. The surgeon, the resident surgeon, a medical student, the pre-op nurse, the operating room nurse, the nurse anesthetist, the anesthesiologist, and a medical assistant. Obviously, they had lots of questions for mommy. What medicines have you taken? When was the last time you ate? Are you allergic to any medicines? Etc.

Although the subjects varied, depending on the area of expertise of the person asking the question, there was one particular question that no one failed to ask. "Are you wearing any underwear?" Really? It almost seemed like a reasonable inquiry until housekeeping came and asked the same thing.

Apparently there has been an outbreak of underwear related issues at the hospital lately. The only thing I can figure is that since it is the University of Utah Hospital, they have all developed an irrational fear of getting wedgied.

Finally, after everyone satisfied themselves with regard to my mom's underwear status (and my dad's, since he kept answering, even though nobody was asking him), they wheeled her off to surgery to take care of that pesky bowel irritation.

This is actually the inflamed bowel that has been bothering mommy. They refused to give it to her, but agreed to take some photos.

The light pink, uncooked chicken breast looking stuff in the top center is the healthy bowel. The puffed up, red part is the naughty stuff. This was taken while it was still attached to mommy.

Here's the sick bowel after it was cut out. The cut ends are joined down at the bottom for this picture. I don't know what the pizza-cheese looking stuff in the middle is. They removed about a foot and half.

Thankfully, they were able to sew the ends together and avoid having to take the plumbing outdoors. Hopefully in the next couple of days the bowel will start functioning again and they can start her on clear liquids. They'll know it's time when she breaks wind. So, you may not want to pass up this rare opportunity to pray for someone to toot.

By the way, the answer was "no."

Christmas Was Great! Thanks For Asking.

2010-01-02T12:51:00.000-08:00

I've found that the key to a good Christmas really isn't that complicated. First, you go through the toy catalogue and identify exactly what you want.

Then, you threaten to hurl yourself down the stairs on a miniature sled if you don't get it.

This simple formula adds up to two simple words. CHA - CHING!

Remote control race cars baby! And of course, the blue car always beats the red one.

This Christmas was especially awesome because mommy was home.

Also, my Uncle Brad came to visit. For Christmas he got a 12 month, all expenses paid, Humvee trip across Afghanistan, courtesy of the U.S. Army. He must have been looking at the wrong toy catalogue.

The only thing mommy wanted for Christmas was to get better. So, next Tuesday, January 4, mommy is going to go in for surgery on her tummy. The doctors finally decided her intestines were just too damaged (from the CMV and GVH) to heal on their own, so they are going to go in and cut several feet out.

A CT scan last week showed several problem areas, so they won't know exactly how much will need to come out until they get in there. Mommy says she hopes she can avoid getting "a bag," whatever that means, but if not, I hope she gets one like this.

That would be awesome!

Did You Miss Me?

2009-12-01T21:23:00.000-08:00

I have no good excuses, I just haven't gotten around to blogging in a while. It's like not changing your diaper when you first wake up. Eventually you just get used to it hanging down around your ankles and you figure, what the heck, there's no point wasting a new diaper now it's almost time for bed again. Before you know it, you've gone two months without a change and no one expects any different from you. Until one day your Grandma calls you and expects you to feel bad for her because since the day she abandoned you a month ago she hasn't been able to keep up with how your mommy is doing or how cute you are getting. So, you finally give in, change your diaper and sit down at the computer.

When last we spoke, I had just entered the "Terrific Two's" and mommy was in the hospital with a feeding tube in her nose and an awful tummy ache. Well, mommy came home from the hospital on October 18 (I think) and has been doing pretty well. Here's a quick run-down of what has happened since.

Amelia went Trick-or-Treating dressed as a hospital patient.

I got my first real chance to play in the snow.

Mommy beat Lola and Amelia at bowling.

Even though Mommy was home and doing fairly well, the fridge was always full of medicines and keeping her IV's running was still a full-time job for Daddy.

I thought he was handling everything fairly well until the day after Thanksgiving when he put up the Christmas tree and called it good.

That's when I realized I was going to have to take matters into my own hands if I wanted Santa to stop at our house for more than a reindeer potty break.

Luckily the room under the stairs, where I'm forced to spend most of my days, is where they store a lot of mommy's medical supplies.

So, I dug out the tree and decorated it with what ever I could find. (I managed to keep most of the saline and heparin flushes sterile until something funky started oozing from the Sharps star.)

I'm particularly proud of this hand-crafted nativity. (Originally there were two sheep, but mommy had a bout of nausea, ripped off his head, and ate his guts - apparently I should have given the Shepperd more than an alcohol swab with which to protect his flock.)

I can only hope Santa won't have too big a problem fitting our presents into these enteral tube feeding bags.

Either way, it should be a great Christmas because Mommy will be home!

Here's a quick run down of her progress:

She used to go for check-ups every week, now she goes every two weeks.

She used to take two medicines for her heart failure, now she only takes one.

She used to take two medicines for CMV, now she only takes one.

She used to take three medicines to fight GVHD, now she only takes two.

She used to take 180mg of morphine a day for the pain, now she only takes 45mg.

My dad used to work 4 hours a week, now he works at least 10.

Mommy still can't eat much and gets most of her nutrition from the IV feedings, but overall she is doing pretty well. In fact, a couple of weeks ago the doctor said, "you should feel normal in about a year." Weeeeee!

We're Still Friends, Right?

2009-10-08T12:43:00.000-07:00

A big "shout out" to all my peeps in Colorado! My Aunt Taryn's sixth grade class made a bunch of get well cards and sent them to Mommy last week. They made her cry, but she said it was a good cry. She says, "Thank you!"

September 19 was Mommy's first anniversary of her transplant. So we scooted down to the hospital, and while I was shakin' my groove thing at the party I couldn't help but think back to the very beginning of this ordeal when the doctors said the goal was to have Mommy off all the medicines and back on her feet after one year. Hmmmm.

Speaking of celebrations, yours truly just turned the Big 2 a few days ago! I threw myself a party, but nobody showed up.

So, I took it on the road again and we partied with mommy in the hospital.

When I got home my Dad tossed me in the wishing basket and stuck a hat on my head. The hat said, "Your next two wishes will come true Charlie T!"

I don't like baskets so I said, "How do I get out of it, Grandma?"

Either the hat isn't too smart or I don't enunciate that well, because next think I knew, the hat yelled, "A hockey outfit for Grandma!" And then....POOF!

I think she liked the outfit okay, it was the knee surgery she had to endure to get the outfit that put her in a sour mood. She threatened me with grievous bodily harm if she ended up in cyberspace, but since she abandoned me this morning and went back to Denver....

Knowing that I only had one wish left, I wanted to make it count. So, after much thought I said, "Two billion marshmallows."

All I could do was cringe when that dumb hat yelled back, "A tube up mommy's nose!" Then a loud POOF!

The phone rang a few seconds later, but luckily we have caller ID, so when the "University of Utah Hospital" appeared on the display we just let it go to the answering machine. Let's just say I waited a few days before I ventured up to the hospital to see mommy again. I believe they call this a "cooling off period."

They used the tube to drain some fluid from mommy's tummy, which had blown up like a basketball. This helped her feel quite a bit better and they actually pulled the tube out yesterday. Unfortunately, her fever came back last week so they started her on another round of antibiotics that should be done in a few days. And they are reducing a couple of medicines that they suspect might be causing some of her tummy troubles. They are pretty confident she isn't having a GVHD or CMV flair up, so hopefully she can start to feel better soon and come home.

In the meantime, I am scouring the house to make sure there isn't any spare tubing laying around that Mommy could get her hands on when she comes home. But I'm sure those were just idle threats.....right Mommy?

Try And Keep Up.

2009-09-27T19:25:00.000-07:00

So, on Wednesday, September 9th, mommy went back into the hospital for treatment of that nasty infection and they found the clot in her gonadal vein. They started her on some IV antibiotic that seemed to make her feel better and gave her shots for the blood clot. They also pulled out the infected PICC line in her right arm and put a new line in her left arm. On Monday the 14th they switched her antibiotic to an oral pill and sent her home. Unfortunately, the medicine was so heavy duty it sent her tummy into a tail spin. Because the IV form of the medicine needed to be taken every 6 hours and is only stable for 2 hours, it was impossible for her to take it at home. So, on Tuesday she went back into the hospital.

Because her tummy was hurting they did another CT scan and learned that she did not actually have a clot in her gonadal vein. But, the new PICC line they put in her arm was hurting so bad they did an ultrasound and found a blood clot in the vein in her arm. So, she kept getting the blood thinning shots.

She stayed in the hospital until Friday the 25th, when her course of antibiotics was done. Just before she was discharged they found that she also had a clot in the main vein of her neck. So they made plans to take out the PICC line in her arm and put a central line back into her chest this coming Thursday.

Mommy came home Friday evening and was feeling pretty well. On Saturday she still felt good, ate some food and was even able to braid Amelia's hair. However, Saturday night she started feeling lousy again and had a fever most of the night. When Daddy took her into the clinic Sunday morning (today) her temperature was nearly 103 and she was having a hard time breathing. So, they put her back into the hospital and started her on some more antibiotics.

Hopefully we'll know soon what kind of bug she has and if it will respond to some medicines she can take at home.

Two Things You Don't Want To Hear From Your Doctor

2009-09-12T11:11:00.001-07:00

Number 1: "In my entire career I've never seen this before."

Number 2: "It always makes me swear whenever I see this particular infection."

Statement number 1 was uttered by one of mommy's transplant doctors after Mommy's latest CT scan showed that in addition to a partial bowel obstruction, she also has a gonadal vein thrombosis. This is a blot clot in....you guessed it, her gonadal vein. It turns out these are often found with abdominal infections, although nobody knows why. They are treating it with shots in mommy's tummy that will thin her blood.

Statement number 2 came out of the transplant doctor when it was learned that mommy has a particularly rare and nasty bug called stenotrophomonas maltophilia. And because all things in the universe are connected, this same bug prompted the ob/gyn doctor who was treating mommy for the gonadal vein thrombosis to then repeat statement number 1.

I don't know why the doctors haven't seen this bug very often, I see it every time I make a puppet out of raw meat and then leave it under my bed for a few weeks.

Because the PICC line in mommy's arm was infected with the bacteria, they had to remove it. They will put in another line in a couple of days. They also believe the clot is harboring this same infection, but they are not sure if the infection came from the clot, or from the line, or somewhere else.

We should know fairly soon if the infection is going to respond to the heavy-duty antibiotics. Right now mommy is doing a lot of sleeping.

Next time mommy goes to the doctor she only wants to hear, "Oh, I've seen a gazillion of these and they always make me use happy words like 'sunshine' and 'powdered donuts.'"

p.s. I've been looking for the right time to use this song, but then myself said to me, "Charlie, there is never a wrong time for Aldo Nova!"

What's Eating You?

2009-09-10T21:02:00.000-07:00

Mommy had to go back into the hospital on Wednesday. She was running a fever on Tuesday and the doctors were hoping it would go away on its own. On Wednesday she went back in for a blood transfusion and the fever was still cooking, so they put her in the hospital. "Something is definitely eating at you," the nurse said when she took her temperature.

She grew another "gram negative rod" bacteria from one of her lines, so they started her on a heavy-duty antibiotic. They also did another CT scan of her tummy today since it still hurts and she is having trouble keeping food down. We should know more in the next day or two.

Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!

2009-08-27T10:36:00.000-07:00

I would like to remind you (mostly Tandy) that this blog is supposed to be about ME! ME! ME!

Today I watched thirteen episodes of "Go Diego Go!," ate half a bag of miniature marshmallows, bumped into three walls, and told Grandma four times that I had pooped when I really hadn't. As if you care.

Here's the deal with mommy. She got out of the hospital a few weeks ago. She is still having trouble with numbness and tingling in her hands and feet. So they did an MRI of her brain and a spinal tap to see if there was any CMV virus in her spinal fluid, etc. Here she is after her spinal tap, feeling like she just got stabbed in the back.

Both tests came back negative. But since mommy can't feel her arms and legs we invented a new game called "Who Can Stick Mommy With The Most Needles Before She Wakes Up?" It was pretty fun until she twitched in her sleep and sent a needle through Dad's frontal lobe. Then they were both twitching in their sleep as my sisters and I scurried from the room.

Actually, Mommy tried acupuncture to help with the pain and nausea. Not only has it helped her symptoms, but it keeps her socks from sliding down too.

Since she got out of the hospital they have been lowering her steroids and that seems to have helped get some of her strength back. Also, the physical therapist comes to the house three time a week and helps mommy walk away from the camera.

In fact, Mommy felt well enough last week that she snuck out for a hair cut...

...went with my sisters to the mall to get glasses (where they apparently joined a group of blind polygamists)...

...and went to Target to get pencils that will sit in the bottom of my sisters' backpacks until next June when school gets out.

For the first time in quite a while, it actually feels like Mommy is making progress. She is getting stronger each day and is able to eat a few hundred calories on her own each day. She is also going without the morphine and is able to control her pain with lesser drugs. She still gets pooped out pretty easily, and spends a lot of time asleep, but she is definitely doing better now than she was a month ago. Yeah mommy!

20 Years...Really?

2009-08-19T21:32:00.000-07:00

An Anniversary Poem
By Charlie T.

They met at high school in Mananas,
he claims she stalked him between classes.

If when she saw him her heart did quicken,
me thinks it must have been slim picken.

T'was likely pity that sucked her in,
or maybe a wager she did not win.

But either way she tested fate,
when the goofus she agreed to date.

For most the summer he held her back,
then at the park she did attack.

From the moment their lips did touch,
he knew she loved him very much.

And who could blame her, I mean really.
his bod was chiseled, his gaze was steely.

And for his love she kept on wishin',
while two years he served a mission.

Just off the plane he had it planned,
sat with her dad and asked her hand.

When the background check showed only bed wetting,
her father agreed and allowed the wedding.

Knelt at the alter and their hands they joined,
Sealer sealed them and this advice he coined:

"Cook what he likes when it's time to be fed,"
"Do what she asks, the first time it's said."

I doubt the groom listened like he should,
as for the cooking, it's always been good.

Don't know what plans they had when they met,
but it's been greater than imagined, I would bet.

They've traveled and schooled and changed careers,
They've adopted and birthed and trimmed dad's ears.

If you lined up the years from first to latest,
I bet they'd agree that the last was the greatest.

Though twenty years has seemed like a dream,
It will only get better with me on the team.

Happy 20th Anniversary Mommy and Daddy!

Running Hypothesis

2009-07-29T21:11:00.000-07:00

The other day as I was listening to NPR on the radio, while weaving re-usable grocery bags from strands of my own dried flem (Go Green!), I heard this piece that made me think of mommy.

It was called the "running hypothesis." The reader's digest version is as follows: Thousands and thousands of years ago, man's brain grew from the size of a walnut...

....to that of a cantaloupe.

And in order to feed such a massive melon, man needed to eat flesh, not just veggies. The problem was that the first weapon that could kill an animal wasn't invented until thousands of years after man grew the huge, meat-requiring brain. So, these two brothers came up with a theory on how early big-brained, bi-pedal humans could have captured their prey and fed their noodles; they ran them to death. They hypothesized that man would just run after an animal until it wore itself out and had a heart attack. Of course, no theory is worth the cave wall it is scribbled on until you try it out.

So, these two brothers went up into the hills (and thankfully took an audio recorder with them) to see if they could chase down a Pronghorn Antelope until it died.

Apparently nobody told these two rocket scientists that the only thing on earth faster than a pronghorn is a cheetah, and that they can run at 30mph for at least five miles.

I actually went through three diapers I was laughing so hard.

They described how the antelope would stand there watching them until they got within a hundred yards or so. Then it would trot off a mile or so and turn around and watch the two "hunters" stop to rest on the spot it just vacated. You could actually hear them dry-heaving and gasping for air. This went on for quite some time until the antelope got bored and disappeared. They never said if their brains got any smaller, but they certainly didn't catch any meat to nourish them.

This brings me to an update on mommy. When we last spoke, she had just gone in for emergency surgery for a bowel obstruction. That went well and they were able to un-obstruct the bowel without resecting any of it, and she came home a few days later.

Unfortunately, a few days after that, her tummy pain got worse and worse and she had to go back to the hospital. Since then they have done a skin biopsy to test for graft-versus-host, a colonoscopy to test for CMV and GVH, a CT scan to look for inflammation in the small bowel, a sonogram of her gall-bladder looking for gall stones, an upper-endoscopy looking for CMV and GHV, and a hepa-scan looking for obstructed biliary ducts.

Thankfully, none of the tests showed active CMV infection, active GVH, or obstructed ducts. While that is good news, the bad news is that they are still unsure what is causing all the pain and inflammation. She is still unable to eat and battles pain and nausea most of the time. Yesterday they started her on more antibiotics for a suspected infection in her tummy (outside of the bowels) and today they decided to start experimenting with different pain medicines to see if they can find something that works. Hopefully, in a few days they will get things stablized and she can sleep in her own bed again.

Sometimes it seems like mommy keeps running and running, only to see the stinking antelope trot off just as she is getting close. But what that antelope doesn't know is that one day, mommy is going to reach into her fig-leaf skirt and pull out a sharpened spear. Then it'll be brain food for the whole village. Go mommy!

Don't Ask Me Why

2009-07-13T23:23:00.000-07:00

In our cupboard we have a bottle of Tabasco sauce that has a piece of paper taped to it. The paper says, "This Is Why!"

Apparently, my older sister Amelia had a bad habit of always asking "why" every time mommy or daddy told her to do something. For example, if my dad would say, "Amelia, go clean your room please." She would respond with, "Why?" My dad would then go to the cupboard and get the answer. Eventually, she lost her desire to know the reason for everything, as well as her ability to taste food.

Ever since child protective services got involved, my dad's been a little timid about getting the Tabasco bottle out. Which is a good thing because this past week we've been asking a lot of questions. We've even gotten a few answers.

Question: Why would my dad spend $841 for dental work on a dog?

Answer: Because he is a spineless pansy.

Question: Why do they measure your height every time you go to the doctor when you've been 5'3" for 25 years?

Answer: Because one day you may fall in the shower, compress one of your vertebrae, and all of a sudden you're 5'2".

Question: Why would you shave a toddler's head and put funny goggles on him?

Answer: Because you can.

Question: Why would you let a nurse stick a rubber hose up your nose for a second time?

Answer: Because your tummy is so bloated you'll do anything to relieve the pressure.

Question: Why would surgeons whisk mommy off to surgery on Saturday night when she has heart failure and no immune system?

Answer: Because she had a bowel obstruction that refused to be ignored.

Question: Why would you lay on your stomach with your hands behind your head?

Answer: Because I said so.

Other than that, we've tried not to ask "why" too much lately. Maybe we're just afraid of the big Tabasco bottle in the sky.

Anyway, mommy seems to be doing well after the surgery. Hopefully this will be the start of something good.

Sometimes It Just Hurts

2009-07-01T20:23:00.000-07:00

Yesterday when mommy was getting ready to go in for her regular doctor check-up she had a little fall in the shower and landed on her bumper. So when she got to the doctor's office they took some x-rays, and today we learned that she has a compression fracture of her L1 vertebrae.

She will go and meet with an orthopedic doctor in the next day or two to get fitted for a back brace that should hold things in place and ease the pain until it heals. She's hoping for one of the new fangled braces that can hold her Popsicles and other necessities while still looking hip and fashionable.

We'll see if the insurance will pay for one in hot pink. In the meantime, daddy is trying to convince mommy that there are easier ways of getting him to pay attention to her while she's in the shower.

(Just a hint mommy, don't bother throwing your rubber duckie on the floor and screaming, he'll just ignore you.)

Food, Get Thee Behind Me!

2009-06-24T21:01:00.000-07:00

I would like to take this opportunity to welcome myself back from Colorado. Welcome back Charlie T....Thank you.

While we were gone mommy and daddy were able to fit together a few pieces of the puzzle with regard to mommy's recovery. They realized two things. First, the amount of calories that mommy was getting through her IV feedings at night was calculated using the assumption that she was eating at least half of her required calories during the day. Second, mommy felt significantly worse every time she ate something. This created a problem that was so obvious it took a few weeks to pick up on it. Because eating made her sick, mommy couldn't eat. Because mommy couldn't eat, her body wasn't getting the calories it needed to even maintain itself, let alone heal itself. She seemed to be getting weaker and weaker each day.

Luckily, this breakthrough realization came on the day of mommy's weekly doctor's visit. They discussed it with the doctors and the solution was obvious. Eliminate food. It seems that mommy's small bowel is still not completely healed from the CMV attack, and her colon is still damaged from the bout with GVHD, and so every time she tries to eat something, her insides go crazy. Another round of gut rest is necessary to give it time to heal. So, they are giving mommy all the calories she needs through the IV, and she is restricted to eating only clear liquids (i.e. jello and Popsicles).

So far, the results are encouraging. She is in less pain and seems to have a little more energy all ready.

And just in time, because today was mommy's birthday. We celebrated by putting up the pools. Clara and Amelia got rowdy in theirs.

While I just relaxed in mine and tried to ignore the gawking ladies. I'm more than just eye candy, you know!

The best part was that mommy was able to venture into the back yard and snuggle me when I got cold. Awesome!

Afterward, we went inside for every one's favorite strawberry/banana birthday jell-o,

And an orange Popsicle that should last mommy most of the summer.

Happy Birthday mommy! We love you! We're proud of you!

In Case You're Wondering Why Grandpa Has A Twitch

2009-06-15T18:30:00.000-07:00

The day started out well enough. Grandma and Grandpa loaded us all up in the van for a little drive. I assumed we were going to Cold Stone Creamery like we usually did after Dad left for work in the morning.

I suppose I should have gotten a clue when Grandma tossed a trash bag full of my clothes into the back of the van.

However, it wasn't until we crossed the boarder into Wyoming that I knew for sure that something was amiss.

I don't think it was a coincidence that this happened just a few days after the gov'ment took away my TV, making it impossible for me to check on the status of the "Amber Alert" that I'm sure was being broadcast on the 2" TV monitor strapped to the headrest in front of me.

And I knew from watching all those shows with Grandma ("Without A Trace," "24," "CSI Miami," "Guiding Light," "The Saprano's," etc.) that I was going to have to act fast if I wanted to save my little half-brown hide.

So, when Grandpa stopped to use the bathroom at the huge Novelty/Lingerie store in Evanston, I decided it was time to make my move. As Grandpa stepped from the car I yelled out the window, "Hey, this is the guy who refused to let Wyoming use their Abandoned Mine Land Fund money to buy the Eiffel Tower and melt it down into the world's largest female silhouette mud flap!"

Holy Cow! That must be a pretty popular bathroom stop, because within seconds, Grandpa was swarmed by an angry mob. All I could see were 10-gallon hats, belt buckles, and wooden legs. I could tell this was going to get out of hand, so I quickly called out, "My mistake, that's not him! But he did abduct me from my home!"

At that point the natives quickly lost interest and dispersed. Luckily the police arrived at that very moment and tasered Grandpa so he would be more alert when they asked him questions.

You can only imagine my surprise when Grandma corroborated his story that my Dad had actually given them permission to transport me across state lines. Unbeknownst to me, everyone had agreed that my sisters and I would spend the next week at Grandma's house in Denver.

Maybe they'll include me the next time they plan a little trip. Until then, I hope you miss me mommy and daddy. (By the way, you owe Grandpa a new pair of shorts.)

We May Never Know

2009-06-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

When mommy first went back into the hospital, they thought she had pneumonia. They finally concluded the build-up of fluid in her lungs was from congestive heart failure, but they weren't sure what caused it. The cardiologists think it was a CMV infection of the heart, the transplant doctors think one of her medicines damaged the heart. The only way to know for sure would be to go in and get a tissue sample of the heart, and nobody was too interested in that, especially mommy.

Regardless of the cause, mommy responded well to the heart medicines and her lungs cleared up. Although they didn't seem to know exactly what had caused mommy's heart problems, the doctors felt like they had it under control enough that mommy could come home.

So, on Wednesday she did.

Yeah mommy!

Now she is working hard at getting her strength back, and trying to eat something other than me.

Hey, At Least She Doesn't Have B.O.

2009-05-28T09:30:00.000-07:00

Rumor has it that when my dad was in his pubescent years he smelled so bad that Grandma made him rub a zinc rock on his pits.

"Zinc for the stink!" became the family battle cry.

So, when I heard that mommy might have B.O., I figured it was another case of Darwin playing a cruel joke on me. I started mentally preparing myself for a lonely and pathetic junior high experience.

Turns out that B.O. stands for something entirely different. Bronchiolitis Obliterans. This is a complication associated with bone marrow transplants where the lungs get damaged and very unpleasant thing ensue. But again, mommy doesn't have B.O.

Turns out that she has congestive heart failure caused by dilated cardiomyopathy.

Apparently her heart thinks it works for the government. It is only doing about a third of the work it is getting paid for. Because it isn't pumping all of the fluid out that it should, the fluid builds up in the heart (dilating it) and in the lungs.

Right now they are treating her with lasix (to get rid of the fluid) and blood pressure medications. Thankfully, she is able to breath a little better now so they moved her out of the ICU and back up to the BMT unit.

Now, if I could just find a chunk of zinc for my dad...

Apparently, It's Not Just A Figure Of Speach

2009-05-25T17:39:00.000-07:00

People are always telling me, "Charlie T, you're so stinking cute you make me sick!"

Unfortunately, I seem to have that exact effect on mommy.

After a month in the hospital, mommy came home on Saturday evening. They felt like the CMV and GVHD in her tummy were under control, and mommy would do better managing her pain at home.

Unfortunately, by Sunday evening, mommy wasn't doing so well. She was having a hard time breathing. My dad claims that ever since the big day nearly 20 years ago (which apparently took place on the lido deck of the Love Boat) he's always had the ability to take mommy's breath away.

But, since he refused to take credit for the chest pain and chills, they decided to head back to the ER around midnight on Sunday (not the place to be on a Memorial Day weekend, by the way).

After several tests (CT angiogram, chest x-ray, head CT, EKG, etc.) they concluded that mommy has pneumonia.

Since they are not able to adequately monitor mommy's oxygen in the bone marrow transplant wing, they had to admit her to the ICU.

While she appreciates the supplemental oxygen and fancy monitors that the ICU has to offer, mommy really misses the BMT wing...

...where they actually have walls and a door around the toilets.

When I went to visit, she was already chiseling away at the plaster under the sink and collecting hair clippings for her paper mache head.

In anticipation of her eventual escape, I have been practicing being a little less cute so that mommy can stick around longer when she finally gets home.

Walk Softly And Carry A Big Stick

2009-05-11T21:31:00.001-07:00

Watching mommy over the past couple of weeks reminds me of one of the workshops they offered at Cute Camp last summer.

The instructor used the analogy of walking a tight rope to teach us about how we needed to balance our ability to get what ever we wanted from our grandmas...

(i.e. an ice cream cone in the van without a bib or any adult supervision)..

...with our moral obligation to leave a little bit of love and attention in grandma's tank for the other, less affection-worthy grand kids.

Although I walked out of the workshop as soon as I registered for the door prize, I was there long enough to appreciate the difficulty of trying to keep yourself in the air without leaning too far one way or the other. That is pretty much what mommy and the doctors are doing now.

(I guess that would be mommy in the fancy diaper, with the doctor on her back).

Mommy is walking a tight rope between the CMV virus and Graft-versus-host disease in her tummy. One the one hand, the medicines that control the GVH suppress her immune system, which allows the CMV virus to flourish. But, if they lower the doses of the medicines, the GVH flares up. Because of this, the doctors are left to fight the virus with medicines only, and they have to use such high doses that the side effects are overwhelming.

I suppose the good news is that between the pain and nausea medicines, mommy spends most of her time asleep.

Hopefully we'll get to the end of the rope soon.

There's A Reason We Don't Have Six Fingers.

2009-04-28T21:57:00.000-07:00

Have you ever noticed how many truly awful things you can collect six of?

...or for Aunt Taryn...

Have you ever noticed how many truly awful things of which you can collect six?

How about these phone covers.

Or these John Deere moonshine jugs.

Or these....things.

How about some wives of Henry VII action figures.

Or Jonas Brother albums. Are you kidding me? Six albums!

But perhaps the worst is the number of times mommy has been in the hospital. Late Sunday night mommy went back in for the sixth time. The stomach pain was getting worse and she wasn't able to keep anything down. At this point they don't know if it is more CMV or a flare up of GVHD. They did yet another colonoscopy today to try and find out.

This led me to contemplate some numbers associated with mommy's sixth stay in the hospital. For example:

221 - the number of days since the transplant.

190 - the number of days Grandma W has stayed with us.

92 - the number of days mommy has spent at home since the transplant.

90 - the number of days our friends have given my sisters a ride to school so daddy can take care of mommy in the mornings.

60 - the number of meals that members of our church have brought in.

52 - the number of different medications that mommy has taken.

50 - the number of days Lola Lopez has stayed with us.

40 - the number of banks that have failed.

29 - the number of bottles of hand sanitizer that are scattered around our house.

12 - the number of doctors that have treated mommy.

5 - the number of CT scans mommy has had.

4 - the number of colonoscopies she has had.

2 - the number of MRI's.

2 - the number of large marshmallows I can fit in my mouth at once.

I think hospital stays are like marshmallows. At some point, enough is enough.

Clogging For Mommy?

2009-04-22T19:24:00.000-07:00

So, yesterday I got an email from my Aunt Taryn saying, "Hey, I'm declaring April 22 to be 'Clogging For Jennifer Day!'" And I'm like..."huh?"

But, desiring to maintain my position as Aunt Taryn's favorite nephew, I figure I'd better go along with it. Luckily, it was a nice day and there just happened to be a parade passing through town.

Clog! Clog! Clog! For Mommy!

Wanting to know how others fared in their quest to honor mommy, I surfed around to various family blogs only to discover that everyone else had "blogged" for mommy, not "clogged." How embarrassing for them!

But, even if they did miss out on the frilly blouses and criminally uncomfortable shoes, people did have some very nice things to say about mommy. Go ahead and read them, I'll wait here.

http://theschroederlife.blogspot.com/

http://anniereynolds.blogspot.com/

http://maryslittlebitsoffreaking.blogspot.com/

http://seymourfamohio.blogspot.com/

http://wahlquist-kentandstacy.blogspot.com/

http://mattandleighwilliams.blogspot.com/

http://kaseyrocky.blogspot.com/

http://blondiesbabbles.blogspot.com/

http://wahlquists.blogspot.com/

http://rhondathebeauty.blogspot.com/

http://garlockfam.blogspot.com/

http://www.garlockies.blogspot.com/

Mommy says thank you to everyone for the kinds words, the thoughts, and the prayers. Tears were shed while reading them. Not from me, of course, since I lost my tear ducts in the war. But somebody was boobing.

After reading all those things about my mommy, two thoughts came to my tiny little mind. First, people seem to like her. Second, if that's what she did when she was sick, just wait until she gets better!

And, since you brought it up, mommy had another CT scan done a couple of days ago. It showed that the inflammation in her small bowel has improved a little bit. They still believe the inflammation and pain is caused by the CMV virus. But the medicine mommy has been taking to fight it, Foscarnet, has gotten so toxic that they finally agreed to take her off of it. Yesterday they started her on a new drug, Cidofovir, that she only has to take once a week. Hopefully, mommy will start to feel a little better once the Foscarnet gets out of her system. For now she sleeps most of the time and gets IV feedings at night.

If Only Sally Sold T-Cells By The Sea Shore

2009-04-03T09:28:00.000-07:00

For those of you who follow this blog purely for the scientific enlightenment, this one's for you. (and please, no need to thank me for bringing you yet another Barry Manilow gem.)

As you know, the white blood cells are the ones that fight infections. There are different kinds of white cells (neutrophils, basophils, eosinophils, monocytes, lymphocytes, etc.) Some are responsible for fighting bacteria, some for fighting parasites, some for fighting allergies. Lymphocytes are responsible for fighting viruses.

Here's how it works.

(Disclaimer: What follows is not intended to take the place of any materials you may be using to study for your medical boards. But if you do use it, please let me know how it turns out.)

1. A virus enters the body, apparently wearing some sort of "hello, my name is..." tag, so everyone knows what kind of bug it is.

2. A little blob, called a macrophage, swallows the virus.

3. The blob then carries the virus, with the virus' name tag dangling from it's mouth, to the T-cell who is responsible for dealing with that particular kind of virus.

4. Excited to have a visitor, the T-cell then makes a bunch of copies of itself, which can do a few different of things. Some copies may squirt out a juice called lymphokines. To the macrophage blob, this juice is like Kool-Aid with way too much sugar in it. It causes the blob to go on a virus eating rampage.

Other T-cells turns into killer t-cells, and attack the virus itself.

(the white blobs are the killer T-cells attacking some sort of virus)

Or, if the T-cells are feeling lazy and oppressive, they find some B-cells with self esteem issues, smack them around a bit, and make them generate antibodies to the virus (which can also be used as accessories to any Polly Pocket collection).

6. These antibodies, in addition to looking very cool, then destroy the virus and protect the body from future invasions of the same virus.

And why, you ask, does Sally need to quit her dead-end job of selling sea shells and move to the more lucrative field of T-cells? Because the B-cells are too consumed with their self-loathing to make any antibodies unless compelled to do so by the bully T-cells. And T-cells are in very short supply after a bone marrow transplant.

When mommy underwent the transplant, all of her T-cells were either obliterated by the chemotherapy, or eaten alive by Uncle Jerry's new stem cells. And, for some reason, that I am sure will be explained in the orientation slide show in Heaven, T-cells do not make the move to the new host in a transplant.

So, whenever a nasty little virus (like CMV) enters mommy's body, the macrophage eats it and then wanders aimlessly with a name-tag sticking out of it's mouth. Unable to find a T-cell that can recognize the name of the virus and greet it with a cup of juice, or a severe beating, the macrophage eventually dies and the virus continues it's unchecked invasion of the body.

Luckily, as the transplant progresses, the body starts making it's own T-cells. But, because they know they were made by Uncle Jerry's blood, when they see mommy's cells, they start juicing. This is when you get graft-versus-host disease. In order to prevent this, mommy takes several medications to suppress the T-cells.

That brings us to where we are today, and why mommy keeps ending up in the hospital. Her body doesn't have very many T-cells yet (about 27% of what she needs), and the ones that she has are medicated to the point they have no desire to juice or oppress. So, mommy is a virtual viral playground.

Now the good news. Mommy is making more T-cells everyday, and she is scheduled to be completely off one of the main T-cell inhibitor drugs in about 8 days. The doctors are realizing that mommy will probably do a lot better if her body is able to fight the CMV virus on its own and if she is able to get off of the nasty anti-viral medication with all of its side-effects.

We'll pray that the T-cells can kick into gear without attacking mommy.

Oh, I almost forgot, mommy came home yesterday!

And, being the brave little soldier that I am, I have volunteered to be her personal T-cell and fight off any viruses while she is at home.

There must be a virus nearby, because I just juiced.

Well Said, Peanut.

2009-03-30T11:04:00.000-07:00

Peanut is the hamster that lives at our public library. I've gotten to know Peanut very well because my Grandma W takes me on walks to the library and then parks my stroller in front of Peanut while she uses the computers to look up liberal websites.

She doesn't think I know, but the other day I pretended to be asleep in my stroller so she let her guard down and parked me to0 close.

BUSTED!

Anyway, Peanut likes to hop onto his little wheel everyday while we're talking. He runs and runs and runs, then stops and looks around his cage. Then he says, "Hey, I think I've been here before."

Sometimes I think mommy feels like Peanut.

A couple of weeks ago mommy went back into the hospital with pneumotosis and a bacteria in her blood. Well, the pneumotosis and the bacteria both responded to the medicines and it looked like mommy was getting better. They started switching all her IV medicines back to oral so that she could go home.

Then, just a couple of days before they were going to discharge her, she started getting a fever and a lot more pain in her stomach. They drew some blood cultures and discovered that she had a new infection, which is actually a return of an old infection. The gram negative rod, enterobacter aerogenes, had returned. This is the same infection she had a couple of months ago. So, they restarted the heavy duty antibiotics and hopefully it will do it's job quickly.

Today they also did another CT scan of her tummy. It showed that the inflammation in her small bowel is not getting much better, and they are not sure why. It could be left over infection from the CMV, or it could be a reaction to one of the immune suppressing drugs. So, tonight they are lowering her steroids some more and decreasing the dose of another drug. This should allow her immune system to fight the CMV a bit more and also decrease the toxicity of the medicine.

Hopefully we'll see some progress within a week so mommy can get off the morphine pump and the hamster wheel and come home.

He Put The "T" In Charlie T. Happy Birthday Grumpa!

2009-03-28T09:38:00.000-07:00

Streptococcus Veridans + Pneumotosis Intestinitis =....

2009-03-19T19:48:00.000-07:00

.... a return trip to the hospital.

Despite every one's best efforts to keep mommy home, we simply weren't able to keep ahead of the viruses and bacteria.

The CMV virus continues to complicate things in the stomach, and that, combined with all the steroids, thinned out mommy's bowel lining so much that air started to leak out through tiny openings. That is the pneumotosis. Unfortunately, little bacteria bugs also snuck out with it and got into mommy's blood. That is the streptococcus viridans.

The pain and the fever were too much to handle at home.

Although the people at the hospital were sad to see mommy come back, the entire team couldn't stop talking about all the fruits and vegetables on the quilt Grandma W made for her.

Dr. Tsai was mostly fascinated by the extensive teeth marks on the mango square. Apparently, if you don't let a person eat for two weeks and then give them a morphine pain pump, the results can be quite harmful to food themed bedding.

Despite the known dangers, I took my yummy little self down to the hospital today to see her. We read stories, sucked on ice-chips, and took turns elbowing each other in the ribs to sit up. (Okay, that was mostly me.) Unfortunately, we even watched a bit of the NCAA Tournament.

Apparently, I blacked out after BYU missed its five-hundred-thirty-seventh layup of the game. When I woke up the nurse was hooking me up to a pulse oximiter. She was quite concerned about what might happen to my heart rate if the Cougars actually boxed somebody out and got a rebound.

But, since I didn't get a "code blue" pre-approved through my insurance, it's probably just as well that the Cougars never gave me any reason to need it. Pathetic.

As for mommy, not only can she hit the open two-footer, she can beat this minor little set back. She is on gut rest for the pneumotosis, antibiotics for the staph, and more heavy duty antivirals for the CMV (which, by the way, has now acquired a mutation, making it resistant to one of the other medicines she was getting).

Once they are convinced the bowel wall is healed up, they will let her start eating again and making plans to send her home.

Go bowel!

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back.

2009-03-05T20:35:00.000-08:00

Remember the awesome photo that Clara took of mommy a couple of weeks ago? Well, she won First Place! Yeah Clara!

Mommy has been home for about a month now and it is awesome! I managed to rearrange my schedule to allow for a little snuggle time every now and then. I don't mind it so much and I think it helps her feel better.

But, since we've taken at least two steps forward over the past several weeks, I guess it was time to take a step back.

Have you ever been driving down the road when all of a sudden a man with an orange flag...I mean a woman with an orange flag...well, somebody with an orange flag and a big walkie-talkie stops you?

And you sit and sit and sit, even though no cars are coming the other direction and there is no apparent reason for you to be stopped? And then all of a sudden the flag goes up and you're allowed to move again?

Well, in this case, the road is mommy's bowel, the cars are what mommy eats, and the flag person is that nasty CMV virus. Yep, it's back in mommy's tummy. They did a CT scan that showed inflammation in her small bowel and gall bladder, and the inflammation in the bowel was so bad it was causing a partial obstruction.

So, starting today mommy is only allowed to eat clear liquids again. Then at night she gets feedings through her IV. She also started taking the two heavy duty anti-viral medicines again. Between the feedings and the medicines, she has something hooked to her IV for 18 hours out of every 24. The doctor said he didn't have any other patients that he would allow to do all of this at home, but he knows mommy is a super-trooper and can handle it.

Tomorrow she is going back for her third colonoscopy. They want to confirm that it is just the CMV and not any graft-versus-host. If it is just the virus then they will continue tapering the steroids so that her own immune system can try and join the fight, at least a little bit.

In the meantime, mommy and I will be sharing Popcicles and Jell-o for a couple of weeks. Just remember mommy, don't eat the Popcicles too fast!

Brain freeze!

"Happy Birth-Weekend Daddy!"

2009-03-03T16:13:00.000-08:00

As we have all come to recognize with time, there are many advantages to going through life as my dad.

Not the least of which is that he was born on February 29, and so he rarely has a specific day on which his many admirers can honor his birth. So, it usually occurs over an entire weekend.

This year was no different. On Friday night Grandpa W came to town and Grandma made a German chocolate cake.

On Saturday Grandma made him 7-layer bean dip and we all watched the Cougars pound the Utes.

On Sunday Grandma made him a banana cream pie.

Grandma loves Daddy! As for Daddy's siblings....that is another story.

This is Daddy's brother Marc. Apparently too busy dying his hair to call and say 'happy birthday."

This is Daddy's brother Kent, too busy counting his chest hairs to call.

This is Daddy's youngest brother Adam, who can't even get his singlet on correctly, let alone us a phone.

And this is Daddy's only sister, Taryn. While fashion may be one of her strengths, calling her brother to say 'happy birthday' is not.

However, on a more positive note, there were presents! Saturday morning we gave Daddy Rock Band 2 for the Wii.

Saturday afternoon we staged a sit-in because Daddy threatened to return Rock Band 2 when he learned that he couldn't actually play Cheap Trick songs on it.

Saturday night Daddy actually returned Rock Band 2 because he is the worst father ever! Now we know why none of his siblings called him. Happy birth-weekend...NOT!

"If You Are Going Through Hell, Keep Going."

2009-02-23T18:28:00.000-08:00

My grandma taught me that it's okay to use potty words if you put them in quotes. I'm just quoting Winston Churchill.

I bring this up because my sister Clara entered her school's photography contest, and the photos had to depict courage. Well, you don't have to spend too much time in our house to find numerous examples of courage.

Try pulling off a blue fairy wand and purple tutu combination!

Or getting between a toddler with a fondue fork and the chocolate fountain.

Or, how about having Grandpa (with the Wahlquist shakes) hook up antibiotics to the IV port in your vein?

Well, this is the picture Clara settled on. She actually took this one herself.

It is titled "One Day At A Time - Bone Marrow Transplant, Day 153"

I think it is a great photo that shows how well mommy is doing these days.

Each week she goes to the doctor, and each week that she doesn't have any setbacks with her tummy, they are able to taper down the steroids a little bit. They have now been able to taper for the past three weeks. If things continue going well, she should be off the steroids in about 4 more weeks. Once she is off the steroids life should get a lot better.

Grandma and Grandpa Lopez were here for a couple of weeks and luckily mommy's tummy had healed enough that she was able to eat lots of Filipino food. She needs to take morphine with most meals, but at least food tastes good again and she is able to keep it in her.

Mommy has been trying to get on her treadmill each day and today she was able to walk 0.8 miles. A new record! Yeah mommy!

We are truly grateful for every bit of progress, and we have seen quite a bit the past few weeks. No infections, no graft-versus-host, lowering steroids, eating better, increasing strength, me getting cuter, etc. We're starting to think there may actually be light at the end of this tunnel.

Or, as Winston Churchill said, "I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals." Wait...I'm not sure that applies here. Oh well.

Fantastic Four!

2009-02-04T22:17:00.000-08:00

Well, for the fourth time mommy was discharged from the hospital on Monday afternoon. The bacteria had cleared out of her blood and she was good to go.

Before she left, they upgraded the single line in her wrist to a double PICC line just above her elbow that runs all the way to her heart. She still gets three different medicines each day through the lines.

This time, mommy brought home a couple of souvenirs from the hospital. She now has her very own "tree of life," that she drags around the house while getting an antibiotic.

The other souvenir is not nearly as neat as the IV stand. It seems she also brought home a re-activated CMV virus. The doctors called the day after she came home and said it was back in her blood. It doesn't appear that she has an active viral infection at this point, so they are hoping that a slight increase in her antiviral medication will take care of it. We should no more in a few days.

Speaking of the next few days, my Grandma W is abandoning me yet again this weekend. It may have something to do with the fact that Grandpa W was only here for one day before I learned to call him "pa-pa," yet in the nearly six months that she has been here, I have yet to utter a single sound that could be interpreted as "grandma." Some people are so sensitive.

It should be quite an adventure having Grandpa here while Grandma is gone. When Grandma informed him that one of his jobs would be making dinner, I thought I heard him say, "no problem, where do they keep the Spam?"

This Is Mommacita's Fault

2009-01-27T15:25:00.000-08:00

About a hundred years ago, Albert Einstein (in addition to showing that it is okay for men to wear open toed flats) came up with his theory of relativity.

It's all a bit confusing to me, but apparently it has to do with gravity being able to bend light and the curvature of space time. Wanting to apply this to the real world, I theorized that if both daddy and his suitcase left Salt Lake City at the same time, the gravitational pull of a distant galaxy would cause a bend in time, resulting in daddy traveling through two more airports than the suitcase, but still getting to San Antonio first.

In order to test my theory I needed to enlist the help of U.S. Airways. As you may know, U.S. Airways has a fleet of Boeing airplanes, the same people that made the bombers used during WWII.

And while they may have upgraded the upholstery since then, they have not invested any time in coming up with a windshield that is any easier to see through. Let me explain.

As we all know, during WWII there were two things that annoyed the Nazis the most. The constant escape attempts by the American POW's, and the nighttime bombing of their oil refineries.

The measures the Nazis took to put an end to escape attempts have been well documented.

Less well known were their efforts to protect the oil. They knew that Americans were flying over their country looking for factories and refineries to bomb. And, similar to the Turkish teenage pranksters who arranged the dead trees on Mount Ararat to trick archaeologists into thinking they found the remains of Noah's Ark...

...the Germans figured they could take advantage of the fact that at 30,000 feet, one big round building looks like any other big round building. So, the Nazis created fake oil refineries to confuse the American bombers. And it actually worked a few times.

I bring this up because apparently, one of these former WWII bomber pilots is employed by U.S. Airways, and apparently, at 30,000 feet the San Fransisco Bridge looks exactly like the Alamo.

It was this proverbial "perfect storm" of history and circumstances that allowed me to test my theory of human vs. luggage travel.

So, on Thursday evening I dropped my dad and his carry-on suitcase at the airport to fly from Salt Lake City to Phoenix, then from Phoenix to San Antonio. He was to leave at 5:10pm and arrive in San Antonio at 11:30pm.

However, as a result of a glitch in the entire U.S. Airways computer system, he didn't actually get on the plane until 6:30. Then, just as he was stepping onto the plane the flight attendant announced that all the over head compartments were full and daddy would have to check his bag.

Then, with my dad wedged into his seat, and the carry-on suitcase (containing his restless leg medicine) crammed in the belly of the plane, U.S. Airways decided it was finally tired of having every single flight across the country delayed. So, they had daddy's connecting flight in Phoenix take off for San Antonio at the same moment he was stepping off the plane from Salt Lake City.

In short, my experiment unfolded like this: From Phoenix, daddy took a 9:10pm flight to San Francisco (where they actually have special containers in the bathrooms for hypodermic needles). He then took a 12:30am flight from San Fransisco to Houston (where it appears sleep and personal hygiene abandoned him) arriving at 4:30am. Then, at 6:30am, he boarded a flight to San Antonio, arriving at 9:00am, the exact time his meeting was set to start.

However, daddy's restless leg medicine was not on the same itinerary. Rather than visit the west coast, it decided to wait for the next day's direct flight from Phoenix to San Antonio and arrived at 2:00pm, just as daddy was getting back to the airport, after his meeting. It was a glorious reunion. Tears where shed. Promises were made. Einstein was right.

At the same time daddy was at 30,000 feet and jogging in place in the spacious airplane lavatory, mommy was having her own little adventure back at the hospital.

The doctors learned that mommy's bacteria is called enterobactor aerogenes. A rather nasty bug that lives in hospitals. They also learned that the central line in mommy's chest...

...was infected. So, on Thursday night they went in and pulled the line out so the infection would not go to her heart. While it is nice not to have a tube sticking out of her chest, it complicates things a bit because that is how mommy got some of her medicines, even at home.

So, on Friday they put a single line into a vein in her wrist.

On Monday, if they are convinced that the bacteria is out of her blood they will put a more permanent double line into her arm.

They are also waiting for the bacteria to clear out of her blood before they will send her home. They took some blood cultures today, but it takes 24-48 hours to get the results. She is starting to feel better, and hopefully she will be able to come home in a few days.

Some good news, she has not let the infection slow down her eating. She was able to eat enough the past few days that the doctors are convinced she can sustain herself. So, today they pulled the feeding tube out of her nose. (I was prohibited from posting any pictures of the tube or the removal.)

Where Do I Pick Up My Nobel Prize?

2009-01-26T14:48:00.000-08:00

I'm guessing that if you have school aged kids in your house, then you are probably knee deep in science projects right now.

My sister Clara is keeping track of how her body temperature changes throughout the day. Apparently, playing six straight hours of Wii drops your core temperature by about 4 degrees and puts you in a semi-coma.

My other sister, Amelia, is trying to figure out how loud she can turn up the volume on the soundtrack to Madagascar 2 before her ears start bleeding.

Feeling left out, I decided to conduct my own experiment.

What do you get if you combine the following:

America's moral compass, Billy Graham...

...Finland's glam-rockers, Negative...

...and quintessential ladies man, Rod Stewart?

That's right. You get a pitri dish full of these.

These are gram negative rods. They are a nasty kind of bacteria.

Somehow, mommy managed to get some in her blood. There are several different kinds and the doctors are still growing them in a pitri dish to find out exactly which species mommy has and to what antibiotic it will respond.

Unfortunately, since gram negative rod bacteremia are not very nice, mommy had to go back into the hospital today. She will be on a broad-spectrum antibiotic through her IV until they know exactly what bug they are dealing with. Then they will unleash the full fury of medical science on the little weenies.

Hopefully, mommy will be home in a few days.

Of course, by then she will be morally wayward, unable to wear pounds of mascara while going weeks without bathing, and completely insecure about her sex appeal.

A small price to pay for eliminating gram negative rods in my opinion.

Who Leaves A Perfectly Good Popcicle Laying Around?

2009-01-23T16:00:00.000-08:00

Mommy was resting on the floor under her blanket when I showed up to say hello.

There was a Popsicle sitting next to her in a cup. Nobody was eating it, so I helped myself. All of a sudden mommy woke up and claimed the Popsicle was hers. We had words.

Next thing I knew, I was in the tub and mommy and daddy were hovering over me.

Then daddy came at me with some sort of electrical torture device. I cowered in fear, but there was no mercy for me on that day.

Knowing that resistance would only prolong the attack, I closed my eyes and gave in to my torturers.

Suddenly, the sweet voice of my dear Grandma cut through the shrill gnashing of the trimmer's teeth. "She's here to rescue me!" I said to myself.

But when I looked up, there she was documenting the awful scene.

"Abu Ghraib Prison all over again," I thought to myself. Someday this will all come to light.

But, perhaps the worst part of the entire ordeal was uncovering more genetic evidence that, indeed, I am a Wahlquist man. No doubt it will start growing out of my ears by the time I am two.

That, aunt Taryn, is how I ended up sitting in a bathtub in my diaper. All for the love of a popcicle.

For Those Inquiring Minds

2009-01-22T21:20:00.000-08:00

So, little Johnny goes to school and he's just crying and crying.

His teacher asks, "What's wrong Johnny?"

Johnny sobs, "My dog's always chasing after cars. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't."

Teacher asks, "Did something happen to your dog?"

Through the tears, Johnny manages to explain, "He was chasing a car this morning and it ran over his butt."

The teacher corrects him, "Rectum, Johnny...rectum."

Johnny bellows out, "Wrecked 'em? Heck, it killed him!"

You can get away with a lot when you're cute.

From Russia With Love.

2009-01-20T19:06:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure how long it took, but my mommy finally came to the basement. Unfortunately, she didn't come looking for me, she just came down to use the treadmill.

But, after a few hours of pounding on the door, she finally heard me. She didn't have the strength to force Grandma to let me out, but she was able to get a few concessions for better living conditions. The clean pajamas and the new wet wipe are nice, but it is definitely the TV that makes the time go by faster.

Of course, since I am stuck with a pirated cable feed, I only get two channels. Fox News and the feed from a Russian satellite.

Luckily, the newer Russian satellites are equipped with mind-reading technology that lets them hear our very thoughts. Since I'm sure most of you never venture to channel 12,354 on you TV, I thought I would pass along some of the little tidbits that were picked up by the Russians during the inauguration yesterday.

Laura: "Please don't tell him the 'rectum, heck it killed him' joke."

Bush: "Wow, he smells really good."

Obama: "Maybe I shouldn't have put on my Tag body spray this morning."

Obama: "If he reaches for my hand again, I'm going to punch him."

Bush: "Maybe he thought it was an accident. If he moves his hand this time, I'll know it wasn't meant to be."

Bush: "Just tell it, everybody loves the rectum joke."

Obama: "I am a great man."

Obama: "I am a beautiful man."

Joe: "I'm a wild and crazy guy!"

Obama: "Why aren't they kneeling?"

Nigel from Des Moines: "Free at last! Free at last!.....wait a minute..."

John: "Hmmm, POW camp or this?...that's a tough one."

Bill: "How you doin'?"
Hillary: "If I can just get Obama, Biden, Pelosi and Byrd to hitch a ride upstate with Teddy, this will all be mine!"

Bible: "You're not actually mentioned anywhere in me. You know that don't you?"

George: "That better not have one of those snakey things that pops out when you open it. I tinkled a bit when Laura did that to me on my birthday."

Tipper: "Must....get....caffeine....falling....asleep....Al...talking....again...."

Michelle: "Eighteen months of parroting the polls and now he can't repeat a few simple words!?"

Michelle: "Did he just say 'rectum'?"

Obama: "I don't get it."
Laura: "Okay, it's kind of funny."

Re-home-ination!

2009-01-15T11:59:00.000-08:00

Have you ever gotten yourself hooked up with one of those yahoo's that can't seem to do a thing without calling you and asking for your advice?

"What should I have for lunch, Charlie T?"
"Should I invade North Korea, Charlie T?"
"Where's the best hiding place in the oval office for one of my gym socks so Barack never finds it?"

Today he wanted to know why the short, square guy with the big head just sits on the table and never plays "I Spy" with him.

The more I tried to explain it, the more confused he got.

Finally, he lost interest and said, "Charlie T, the entire country rejoices in the re-home-ination of your fine mother."

"The what?" I asked.

"The uh...re...re...uh...re-home-ination." He stammered.

"In a few days you're not going to be able to make up your own words anymore. Nobody knows what you're talking about." I said.

"She's home, boy! Your mommy came home today!" He Texas yelled.

"Nobody told me!" I Utah yelled back.

"I'm telling you! Now go give her three big hugs. One from you and one from 'W'." He said.

"I can't! Grandma locked me under the stairs again, and all I can hear are the sounds of '24' echoing through the house." I whimpered.

"Oh no! Did Jack get himself in another pickle?.....Sally! Get Condolezza on the phone, we need to save Jack again!" Then I heard the phone hit the ground and the sound of cowboy boots galloping across the tile.

The next thing I knew the phone line went dead and a dry tortilla slid under the door. I'm not sure if this is lunch or dinner. You lose track of time in the hole.

Anyway, I'm sure mommy will make her way to the basement in a few days and start asking questions. Grandma will crack for sure.

Happy Re-home-ination mommy! I'm in the basement!

Up Your Nose With A Rubber Hose!

2009-01-10T10:20:00.000-08:00

Have you ever undertaken a project or an adventure and just had that feeling that, for some reason, you just weren't getting the full experience?

Like going on a rafting trip and never being tossed out of the boat and into the rapids. You had fun, but what would it have been like to have the excitement of being pulled under the water and having your head smacked against a boulder? Now that's an adventure!

Or how about trying to take the country in a whole new direction? You could do it with the right plan and the right people. However, would you be getting the most out of the experience?

But, trying to bring about change by surrounding yourself with a bunch of re-tread advisers and without a single coherent plan? Now that's an adventure!

Or, what about spending four months in the hospital? If you only get your food through an IV or through your mouth, are you really getting the full hospital experience? Wouldn't it be more fun if they shoved a tube up your nose and down into your stomach?

Now that's an adventure!

This way mommy's tummy can practice digesting food whether she's awake or sleeping.

Daddy just likes practicing sleeping on the always comfortable fold-out chair.

Hopefully this feeding tube will help mommy heal quicker so she can come home soon.

Also, two additional tests confirmed that the CMV virus was negative.

So, if you feel like you're just not getting the most out of what life is throwing your way, try sticking a rubber hose up your nose. You'll find it adds a whole new layer to the adventure.

Barry Manilow, Again?

2009-01-04T21:21:00.000-08:00

What do John McCain....

The CMV virus...

and the Gingerbread Man....

...have in common?

They have all been defeated!

For those of you keeping track, mommy got the CMV virus shortly after getting out of the hospital just before Halloween. The CMV virus was a major player in damaging mommy's insides. Since that time, the virus has been in her blood and the doctors have been unable to get rid of it.

In addition to weekly IVIG infusions (thanks again to the tens of thousands of people who donated plasma to make this happen) she has been getting heavy duty doses of two anti-viral medications for nearly two months. Despite this, the virus remained at high levels in her blood and posed a constant threat to re-activate and cause serious damage. This was especially true because of the immune suppressing drugs that were needed to fight the GVH. There was simply nothing mommy's body could do to protect herself from this virus.

Until today that is.

Today our local Mormon congregation had a special day of fasting and prayer on behalf of mommy. The thoughts, prayers, and support that were offered were inspiring and overwhelming.

It was after coming home from church that mommy's CMV test came back negative. After months of not making any real progress in reducing the level in mommy's blood, the virus is now undetectable.

This came as a big surprise to the doctors. So, despite the solid evidence before them...

...the doctors are re-running the test to make sure the virus is out of the picture.

Of course, we don't need to wait for the second test to know the results. This is very good news for mommy and should lead to significant progress in her recovery.

Yeah for mommy!

Yeah for prayer and fasting!

Yeah for the Country Park 8th Ward!

Yeah for everyone else who has kept mommy in their thoughts and prayers!

Boo for college football making the bowl season last longer than the regular season!

Can't Get Enough GVHD Baby!

2009-01-01T19:07:00.000-08:00

Have you ever gone to the doctor's office where they hand you a bunch of paperwork to sign, and rather than actually read through it all, you just sign it and hand it back to the faux-friendly receptionist?

My daddy once told me that the only practical thing he learned in law school was to never read form agreements before he signed them. So if it contains obligations that nobody in their right mind would actually agree to, then you might have a chance of getting out of the agreement, even if you signed it. (Unless the all-knowing legislature decides otherwise, that is.)

Anyway, we think we may have discovered why GVHD just can't get enough of mommy.

While sorting through all of mommy's medical records, we stumbled across this little ditty that mommy must have signed without knowing it. (click on it if you're having a hard time reading it)

The University Hospital must have gotten sued somewhere in the past for not complying with a patient's wishes because they have been very thorough in making sure that mommy has received all of the GVHD requested.

She got it in her skin and liver first. Of course, the battle with the gut GVHD has been well documented. Last week it was confirmed that she had it in her mouth and throat. And a couple of days ago she had an eye exam to see if it had gone there too.

Unfortunately, it had. So, in addition to the steroids to treat the gut, mommy is now putting steroid drops in her eyes and rinsing her mouth with a steroid swish. It appears that the mouth and throat GVDH is the main reason she wasn't able to eat enough food and had to go back to the hospital Christmas night. It was the next day that the gut GVHD returned.

Luckily, as you can see on the form, nobody checked the boxes for brain and heart GVHD. And, an MRI of the brain yesterday confirmed that mommy's GVHD elevator does not go all the way to the top floor.

Mommy asks that we all pray that the hospital paper-pushers do not find any more forms requesting any other types of GVHD.

In the meantime, mommy has apparently under taken an expiremental treatment of her own to combat the GVHD. This is the thermostat in her room.

I went to visit her today and practically melted. Unless GVHD has sweat glands, it doesn't stand a chance.

In Theaters Now!

2008-12-29T15:39:00.000-08:00

Each year it seems there are a few films that are released just before the end of the year so they can be eligible for the Academy Awards. They only show up in a few theaters and are usually character driven dramas with big stars.

Well, this year is a little different. It is a low-budget horror film that is making a strong push for Oscar consideration.

That's right, GVHD (graft versus host disease) is back in the gut for more in this action packed sequel. Given the popularity of the original, the producers were insistent on bringing back all the cast. Including, Cramping, Exhaustion, Bloating, and every one's favorite, Diarrhea!

Critics are already a-buzz over the jaw dropping scene in which the heroine, played brilliantly again by mommy, is rudely denied a bowl of soup by the evil hospital cook.

"No food or drink by mouth for you!" he screams over and over as mommy is dragged from the kitchen and hooked up to the IV feeding tube.

However, despite the critical buzz, industry experts argue that the content is too distasteful to have much box-office staying power and that the film will have run its course in a matter of weeks.

Hopefully they are right.

.....At Least For A Few Hours

2008-12-26T18:53:00.000-08:00

It was awesome to have mommy home for Christmas. I think she was the most excited out of everyone that morning. We all went downstairs and opened presented.

Amelia got new glasses.

I got a banana peel.

Clara got a Wii...Grandpa got a whuppin'.

Grandma got me.

Unfortunately, a few hours later we had to take mommy back to the hospital. She simply wasn't able to eat or drink enough to keep herself going. She learned that she now has graft-versus-host disease in her mouth and throat. The result is that she isn't making enough saliva and it is hard to get food down the hatch.

She was able to make it until Christmas on Ensure drinks and Popsicles. But after that, there just wasn't enough gas in the tank.

She will need to stay in the hospital until she is able to learn how to get food down.

In the meantime, daddy is perfecting his recipe for liver and onions flavored Popsicles.

Wii love you mommy! Wii miss you!

She'll Be Home For Christmas!

2008-12-19T21:06:00.000-08:00

Look at that! It's a cart full of mommy's stuff outside our van. That can only mean one thing...

That's right! Mommy's leaving the hospital!!! Again!!! Yeah Mommy!!!

My sisters and I were quite surprised when she came strolling in. We had no idea! Otherwise, I'm sure my sister wouldn't have been wearing that scarf with a green headband. How embarrassing.

Should I be offended that she wouldn't hold me without a mask on? Do I stink?

Now that she's home and doesn't have nurses waiting on her twenty-four hours a day, she is putting my sister to work managing her medicines.

It won't be easy. She takes about 30 pills a day and still gets medicine through her IV port. Twice a day she gets an anti-virus medicine for two hours to continue the battle against the stubborn CMV virus. At night she is hooked up for eight hours so she can get the electrolytes she is missing from not being able to eat everything yet.

Hopefully, she'll be able to eat enough Filipino food over the next few days to avoid having to take the supplements for very long.

Yeah Mommy! We Are SOoooooooo Glad You're HOME!!!!!

It's That Time Of Year, Again.

2008-12-18T19:29:00.000-08:00

What do mowing the lawn and writing the annual Christmas letter have in common? Fathers pass the responsibility on to their sons as soon as humanly possible.

However, as I sat down to write I couldn’t help but wonder how many people actually read those things. I was sure that others must have asked this same question and that somewhere along the line the government must have given somebody money to study this. So, I went to the source of all knowledge. Google. I asked him, "Google, what percentage of people read Christmas letters?" Here is what I found out, seriously.

ER visits increase by 9% during the holidays.
72% of dogs yawn after their owner yawns.
77% of women smile after being given a candle.
60% of prison inmates are illiterate.
Lashing a Christmas tree to the top of your SUV creates 26% more aerodynamic drag.
83% of young Russians think libraries should provide answers to questions.
62% of football tail-gaters use charcoal.
There are 12.4% more deaths on Christmas day than other days.
93% of seniors have shopped online.
46% of people can't remember what they got for Christmas last year.
In Japan, 20% of Kentucky Fried Chicken’s annual revenues come on Christmas day.
36.2% of women have flagging libidos.

Either I’m the most inquisitive human on the planet or the government is doing us all a great disservice in how it allocates research money.

So, since none of you are actually going to read my letter, there is no point in writing one. However, in order to keep up the charade, I will be sticking a bunch of empty envelopes in the mail. If you happen to get one, be sure and pass your frustration on to my dad. Maybe if he gets enough complaints he won’t make me do it again next year. Wait till the snow melts and he sees what I did to the lawn.

For those of you interested in how mommy is doing, read on...

Last weekend, Uncle Phillip and Aunt Megan came to visit. Seeing Uncle Phillip made mommy feel good about how much hair she had on her head.

Also, since Grandma W abandoned me for another man, Lolo and Lola Lopez have been hanging out with me. Hopefully, Lola will have learned her shapes and colors by the time she leaves. She's a quick study.

Also, mommy has continued to increase her diet. She has added cream of wheat, cream of rice, cream of chicken, cream of mushroom, and facial cream. She washes it down with a tall glass of non-dairy creamer.

Actually, today she ate her first piece of meat in six weeks (if you consider a sausage link meat). It went down and stayed down. The doctor's are still confident she will be home by Christmas.

And Now...The Rest Of The Story

2008-12-05T15:08:00.000-08:00

If any of you have had a hard time following exactly what has been going on these last few months, please raise your hand....

(I know, it's a repeat photo, but it's a good one).

No..no..no... I mean, have you had a hard time keeping up with exactly what is going on with mommy and her tummy? Well, you are not alone.

After meeting with the doctor today, mommy and daddy have a little better understanding of what has been going on (or at least what they think has been going on) for the past few weeks. Since it may have been kind of hard to follow in real time, allow me to do a little refresher course and bring you up to speed.

The first time mommy was in the hospital, she underwent the transplant. They suppressed her bone marrow and then she was infused with Uncle Jerry's stem cells. Uncle Jerry's stem cells then repopulated the bone marrow with a whole new immune system. It appears that the transplant itself was a success. Her, bone marrow and all the blood cells made by it, have long hair and play in a rock band.

However, because all of the infection fighting cells think they are still inside Uncle Jerry, they see mommy's body as foreign and attack it. To try and prevent this, mommy was sent home from the hospital with a medicine to suppress the new immune system. Despite this, the cells attacked mommy's liver and skin. This is GVHD (graft versus host disease).

The doctors recognized this pretty quickly, and to get it under control, gave mommy high dose steroids. The GVH seemed to respond. The liver tests normalized and the rash stopped spreading. However, because it is not good to be on steroids for too long, they decided to lower the dose after about a week.

The next day, mommy's skin rash attacked with a vengeance and she started having serious "D" word. For the next week or so, they continued to increase the steroids, but things just got worse. That is when she was readmitted to the hospital. They did the colonoscopy, which showed all that awful damage to her colon, and began treating the GVH more aggressively.

They increased the steroids and added several other drugs to suppress the immune system some more. The liver continued to look normal, and the skin rash stabilized, but the "D" word raged on. The belief was that Jerry's immune system was continuing to attack the intestines, so they continued to increase the drugs to suppress it.

At around this time, the CMV virus started showing up on blood tests. Both mommy and Uncle Jerry were negative for this virus before the transplant, but somehow, in the few weeks mommy was home, she was exposed to the virus and caught it. The virus was now eating away at her intestines.

At this point they added several antiviral medicines to combat the CMV. They have tests where they can actually count how many CMV DNA molecules are in mommy's blood. The levels were going down, but not as fast as they would have expected. Meanwhile, the "D" word wasn't getting much better either.

So, they did another colonoscopy, which revealed that the colon, etc. was healing and the biopsies were negative for GVH.

After looking back at the entire past month, here is what they now believe happened. The gut GVH occurred at the same time as the liver and skin GVH. It likely responded to the steroids at the same time as the liver and skin. However, when the immune system was suppressed by the steroids, the CMV virus snuck in and set up shop in the intestines.

So...when they increased the steroids and added the additional drugs to suppress Uncle Jerry's immune system (thinking they were fighting GVH), the CMV virus had free reign of the gut. And even though mommy was getting anti-viral drugs, they weren't able to do the job without the help of an immune system. In hindsight, it appears the CMV was the main culprit all along, and not the GVH.

That brings us to today. The plan is now to dramatically reduce all of the immune suppressing drugs. They believe the risk from the CMV, and other infections, is greater than the risk posed by another round of GVH. Over the next few days they will begin tapering the steroids and the MMF (the other main immune suppressing drug), with the goal of being completely off the MMF in two weeks and the steroids in six weeks. By doing this, the immune system should kick in and do its job of eliminating the CMV virus (although you never actually get rid of it completely - most of us have it).

Part of the plan was for mommy to continue sipping water for a few days to see how she responded. However, as you probably know, mommy isn't much for taking things nice and slow.

So, this morning mommy talked the doctor into allowing her to move up to Jell-O. Needless to say, there was much rejoicing. This was a HUGE milestone! Go mommy...go mommy!

She followed this up with some broth, apple juice and a Popsicle later in the day. She is determined to get to liver and onions sometime next week.

Yeah mommy, again!

Don't Let The Music Move You.

2008-12-04T20:09:00.000-08:00

Wait for it...wait for it....

In the two days since mommy started drinking water, she has consumed exactly one-half of this 8oz bottle of water. And, she seemed to do okay.

Her reward for this heroic achievement? 1 Gallon of pure liquid joy.

Even though she hadn't had anything to eat or drink since she arrived at the hospital on November 5, they wanted her to drink this to "clean her out" for another round of endoscopic entertainment.

As you may recall, the last exam revealed some serious damage to the colon from the GVH and the CMV. After a few weeks of treatment, they wanted to see if her tummy had been able to repair itself.

As a refresher, this was part of mommy's colon two years ago.

This was the same part of the colon after the GVH and CMV had their way.

Well, this is the same part of mommy's colon this morning.

Maybe not someplace you'd want to take a date, but still, a vast improvement from a few weeks ago.

When she woke up from the procedure the first thing she asked for was liver and onions. It may be a bit soon for that, but maybe she'll be able to finish off that bottle of water.

Yeah mommy!

Baby Steps

2008-12-02T20:41:00.000-08:00

A few nights ago I surprised mommy by showing up in my jammies with bottle in hand. It was awesome to snuggle her while she topped off the tank.

I even came prepared with a couple of bedtime stories for her to read.

The past couple of days mommy has started to make some progress in her fight against the GVH and the CMV.

On the outside, the skin rash is starting to fade a bit.

And yesterday she was able to take her first real sip of water in almost a month. If it doesn't hurt too much, or cause a major attack of the "D" word, she will continue to sip for the next several days before moving on to bigger and better things.

After Thanksgiving we put up a Christmas tree and a few decorations in mommy's room. But Nurse Elma said we weren't allowed to plug in the tree until the fire marshal came and inspected it. We plugged it in anyway. What are they going to do? Make her go home?

Speaking of Christmas, if anyone is interested in sending Christmas cards to mommy, they can be sent to:

University of Utah Hospital

Attn: Jennifer Wahlquist

BMT Room 511

50 N. Medical Dr.

Salt Lake City, UT 84132

Are You Allowed To Say "Diarrhea" On The Internet?

2008-11-26T19:42:00.000-08:00

Mommy has now been in the hospital for three weeks. I've lost track of all the different medications they have started and stopped during that time. As you may recall, it was the unrelenting "D" word that brought us here in the first place. That is how they discovered mommy's tummy was having an "Everything Must Go, Going Out Of Business" sale.

At first it was the GVH eating away at the intestines. Then somewhere along the way she went and picked up one of these.

This is the CMV virus, and it decided to move into mommy's tummy and start snacking away at the intestinal lining as well. Right now you are asking yourself, "what about Office IVIG?" Apparently Officer IVIG got his job based on his looks, and not his skills. Needless to say, he is now unemployed and qualifies for some bail out money.

The other complicating factor is that nearly every medicine mommy is taking to fight the GVH and CMV has the ever popular side effect of....that's right, the "D" word!

So, over the past few days they have switched to a stronger CMV fighting medicine and have started to taper off some of the other GVH medicines. Since then mommy has been gradually improving. She is still several weeks away from being able to test the intestines by eating or drinking anything, but at least she is in less pain and is making fewer trips to the throne.

A couple of weeks ago, Lola and Lolo Lopez came out to visit mommy for a few days.

Apparently, they tried to rob a bank, so mommy had to put them in time out.

Three times a week mommy gets to pretend that she is a rich movie star at a swanky spa in the Pacific. She imagines that Armando is slathering her body with oil while her eyes are covered with organic cucumbers.

But, then she wakes up to discover that Armando's real name is Bernice, and there are no cucumbers, just the crusted up goo that leaks from her eyes because of the steroids.

My daddy can't wait for mommy to come home. Or maybe he just can't wait for mommy to not be all alone in a hospital room with a laptop and access to the Internet.

However, she did order me this nice winter coat.

The only problem is that it is red. Grandma took me for a walk this morning in it and I nearly got hit in the head by a Max Hall pass.

Speaking of heads. Mommy's hair continues to grow, and despite all the data I gathered regarding how she should coif herself, she elected to go in a different direction.

She thinks its funny to point at all the nurses and say, "You're fired!"

It kind of creeps me out.

RISE AND SHOUT!

2008-11-21T10:43:00.000-08:00

As I'm out and about, mixing with the little people, I get asked two questions more than any others. The first is, "Charlie T, will you dance for us?" I guess they assume that because I am a Wahlquist, dancing must be in my blood. I always respectfully decline their endless implorings.

The second most common question is, "Charlie T, are you Blue or Red?" This one I feel compelled to answer. However, before continuing, you must read Instruction Number 2 in the right hand column.

A Football Poem
By Charlie T.

This is my most favorite time of the year,
Not for the food or the holiday cheer.
But the scent of victory that wafts through the air,
The wailing of Utes as they cuss and they swear.

Each fall we gather for this glorious game,
And pray that the outcome is always the same.
For which team is better by all it is known,
Yes, Harline's still open in the end zone.

Now some take offense at Brother Bronco's approach,
Treating the stadium as if it's a church.
But from games, like conference, there's knowledge to glean,
Live right and magic happens on fourth and eighteen.

Now, I'm not saying Utes are lacking in class,
They're very polite while pumping my gas.
They get their diplomas with smiles on their faces,
It allows them to park in those handicapped spaces.

I hope this year when they're licking their bruises,
That they don't pull out all those tired excuses.
Like, "football's not why we chose such a school,
We came to learn reedin' and ritin' and rools."

Please don't be angry when you're team doesn't win.
Blame your grades and not me that you didn't get in.
Use our co-eds as fodder for all of your jokes,
And remember anythings funny with enough tokes.

All of this teasing is just in good fun,
As long as the Cougars the game they have won.
And if I've offended or made your eyes tear,
I take it all back, until this time next year.

GOOOOOOOO COUGARS!!!!

Attacks Caught On Film.

2008-11-19T12:23:00.000-08:00

Warning, the following post contains shocking images of awful attacks on innocent victims. Some picture may be grotesque and offensive. Viewer discretion is advised. Seriously.

Here is a picture of part of mommy's intestines taken two years ago. Slimy, but healthy.

This is a picture of the same part of mommy's intestines taken last week, after an unprovoked attack by her new immune system.

Here is an old picture of Grandpa Lopez, trying valiantly to defend himself from an unprovoked attack by a balloon and what appears to be a very large caterpillar.

Here's a picture of a young Uncle Philip. Clearly delirious after a horrific, but likely provoked, attack by the 1980's.

Here's mommy and daddy on their honeymoon in Delaware. Exactly who attacked who is in some dispute.

As for Grandpa, Uncle Philip, and the honeymooners, they all appear to have emerged from their encounters unscathed. The jury is still out on mommy's intestines.

It turns out that gut GVHD is more insidious than a father/son hip-hop dance team from Boise. It's a bit more like a door to door insurance salesman with a screw loose.

As you can tell from the picture, he did some serious damage to mommy's insides. The medicine mommy started taking last week, Inflixamib, is designed to help heal the damaged tissue.

In the meantime, mommy's stomach has no lining, so it is essentially like Brownsville Texas. Everything (blood, fluids, viruses, bacteria) just passes back and forth across the intestinal border without proper documentation. The risk is that some sort of virus or bacteria will sneak across the border and into the blood stream. Luckily, the doctor's were able to get approval from the insurance company to bring in a heavy duty border guard medicine to protect her.

This is Officer IVIG (intravenous immunoglobulin).

He does a number of things, including fighting off attacks by the CMV virus and slowing down the the leaking of blood into (and out of) mommy's intestines. (Thanks to the 3,000 people who donated the plasma needed to make a single bag of Officer IVIG.) She will get three doses of this over the next three days. Hopefully, we'll start seeing evidence of healing in the next few days.

The goal is for mommy to be home by Christmas.

Brown Boy, Brown Boy, What Do You See?

2008-11-14T08:55:00.000-08:00

I see some tiny hairs staring at me.

That's right, mommy's hair is starting to grow back.

And although my daddy likes her bald, she seems insistent on growing it out. The good news is that when you are starting from scratch you have lots of options.

And there is no doubt that when the time comes to choose a new hair style, mommy will consult with me. In light of this, I thought it would be helpful to conduct some marketing research so that I can give her the best advice possible.

Here are just a few of the hair styles mommy has sported in the past. I would be curious to know which lid you think she should go back to.

There is the full-haired mommy...

The 3/4 haired mommy...

The 1/2 haird mommy...

The 1/4 haired mommy...

And finally, the zero haired mommy.

Obviously, she is lovely to behold no matter what she has going on, but there is no fence sitting for this poll.

That's Right Ladies, Charlie T Is Bipedal!

2008-11-13T12:36:00.000-08:00

If there is a reason I don't have any pants on, nobody shared it with me. Everybody else was fully clothed.

Blessed Are The Cheese Makers.

2008-11-11T13:59:00.000-08:00

Mommy has now been in the hospital for a week, and can't figure out why she ever left. Here's another new contraption mommy discovered. This one sucks the gunk out of her throat that is making her cough all the time. I'll spare you the photo of the bucket on the other end.

Even though mommy doesn't feel great it hasn't stopped her from staying in charge. Here she is giving the Physician's Assistant a spread sheet of what medicines she wants and when she wants them.

Unfortunately, all the suction and bossing hasn't made her feel any better. She still can't eat and her stomach is still very angry, and I think we all know what that means.

So, today they started mommy on a new medicine called Infliximab. The doctor went to great lengths to explain how the drug works.

Apparently, it was created by injecting a mouse with some sort of human cell so the mouse's immune system would create an antibody that would attack the cell.

Then they somehow take the antibody from the mouse and cut it in half.

THE ANTIBODY, NOT THE MOUSE!

Then they take half of the mouse antibody and staple it to half of a human cell whose job is to look for other messed up human cells (as well as to protect the interests of large insurance companies).

They then inject this freaky half mouse/half human blob into mommy. The blob then makes its way to the stomach and knocks on the door of an ornery intestine cell that won't heal.

The ornery intestine cell opens the door, sees only the human half of the blob, thinks it has come to ask for foreign policy advice, and let's it in. The blob enters, quietly dragging it's mouse rear-end antibody behind it. Now inside, the mouse antibody swings around and attacks the ornery intestine cell, beating it like a Utah County Democrat.

As the life drains out of the ornery intestine cell, it looks up at the human half of the blob and says, "never give a mouse a stimulus check." It then expires and the half human/half mouse blob moves on to the next ornery intestine cell. Eventually, the entire neighborhood is destroyed and re-zoned for high density commercial use.

At least, that's the plan for now. Hopefully, we will know in a week or so if the stomach is going to change its attitude.

Mommy Got Hosed!

2008-11-07T10:33:00.000-08:00

Well, mommy had both an upper endoscopy and a colonoscopy yesterday. Two hours of end to end fun. It took so long because the doctor was a bit in arrears on his schedule.

The pathologist confirmed that mommy does indeed have Graft Versus Host in her stomach and small intestines.

However, it turns out that Graft Versus Host is just a father and son hip-hop dance team from Boise.

The hope is that with a lot of gut rest (no food or drink) and some funky steroid powder mommy has to swallow, they can get it healed up soon. It is basically like the rash on her skin, except in her tummy.

In the meantime, mommy will hang out at the hospital with what may be a world record number of IV's connected to her port.

The upper endoscopy also left her throat a bit irritated so they gave her this contraption.

It's a little hard to understand her when she talks, but I'm pretty sure she said something about crushing the rebellion.

We Have Nothing To Fear But Fear Itself...And The First 100 Days.

2008-11-05T20:05:00.000-08:00

Okay, call me a cynic. But watching thousands of weeping Barakites after the election last night left me a little freaked out. Two words came to mind as I watched; "Kool Aid!"

And for the record, I ain't thirsty.

If you're like me, you may need a little motivational poster to hang above your crib as you leave the shores of Free Marketland and take a little cruise on the SS Socialist.

Now don't you feel better? Me neither. See ya!

But, before I go scrounge up some change I can believe in (which will then be redistributed to those without the gumption to scrounge up their own change), a quick update on mommy. She has been having major tummy troubles for the past week. The doctors think the GVH is now in her intestines. So, today they put her back in the hospital.

The goal is to definitively make a diagnosis (via endoscopy tomorrow) and then give her stomach time to rest and heal itself.The only way to let her tummy rest is to not put anything in it. So, each day for breakfast mommy will have some of this through her port.

For lunch, she'll have some of this.

For dinner, she'll have some of this.

And, if she wants a snack...well, you get the idea. Although, it is a relief to have mommy in the hospital so she can finally get this under control, it is a bit of a downer because it may take several weeks for her tummy to heal.

Love you mommy.

Smell My Feet!

2008-11-02T09:36:00.000-08:00

Halloween Rocks! We all got dressed up (except for my stick-in-the-mud dad) and went around the neighborhood begging for candy.

Clara went as Harry Potter.

Amelia went as Hermione Granger.

I went as Charlie T, dressed in a silly mouse costume.

Aunt Taryn went as a pre-schooler at a Chuck-E-Cheese birthday party.

Mommy went as a measel. (Thanks to mommy's friends Lisa, Lori and Mary for the awesome Halloween quilt.)

I'm not sure if it was dressing up as a communicable disease, or not leaving the house, but mommy didn't get much candy.

What's Going On?

2008-10-30T15:36:00.000-07:00

The last week has not been a good one for mommy. The rash is spreading and she feels lousy. The doctors aren't sure if it is graft-versus-host or some sort of virus.

Here's mommy as the doctor's office wishing they would figure it out.

This is Dr. Venkatesh Krishnamurthy Rudrapatna taking a biopsy of mommy's rash to send to the lab so they can try and figure out what is causing it.

This is Dr. Halvorsen taking an ultrasound of mommy's liver to see if they can figure out why her liver enzymes are still elevated.

The last time mommy had an ultrasound they were taking pictures of my privates.

No word yet on the gender of the liver. I'm hoping for a boy.

Here's Dr. Venkatesh Krishnamurthy Rudrapatna on the phone with the lab asking them why the keep running the wrong test on mommy's blood.

Here's nurse Ellen's gloved hand taking a swab of mommy's nose for another test.

Mommy was pretty sure that nurse Ellen thought she was supposed to get a swab of mommy's brain. Hopefully we'll know the results of all these wonderful tests next week.

Get Off Charlie T's Back!

2008-10-24T19:32:00.000-07:00

The comments I received from my last post were less than positive.

"Where's the humor Charlie T?"
"That last post was boring Charlie T!"
"That's all you got Charlie T?"
"How about a poem Charlie T?"

And those were just the comments from my mommy.

Believe it or not, I have more going on in my life than trying to come up with funny things to post on this blog! For instance, I've been asked to help His Obamness device a plan for redistributing the wealth in the soon to be created Socialist Republic of America. It starts with buying up all the banks so the people who don't have jobs won't lose their houses. Then I'm going to make sure none of the people who have jobs have to pay any taxes. Then we're going to find all the big people who give the little people the jobs and make sure they are taxed until they lose their jobs, and then we will give them a house. However, what really makes the plan work is enacting a law requiring Seinfeld to start making his show again and putting it on the air twenty-four hours a day so that we can all die laughing as we consume the last kernel of cracked wheat from our food storage before the world is consumed in an awful ball of flames.

But, none of you seem to care about that. All you want is a funny post. Fine. In an effort to stimulate the economy, I went out and hired some people to write a poem for you.

A Funny Poem
By Hector, Miguel, and Bob.

Mommy's home, where we hope she'll bloom.
Though it still looks and smells like a hospital room.

The steroids she's on makes her spin like a twister.
At two in the morning she did this to my sister.

Grandma left and in her new house muddles.
So Taryn came to read books and give me cuddles.

Thought she was here so my needs she could attend to.
But she was not to be seen when my sisters found the tutu.

And she was probably phoning...chatting with her guy,
When my sister took a spoon and dug out my eye. (not really)

But in the end I'm the one who has all the fun.
I pretend that I pooped and make her look at my bum.

There. I hope you're all happy.

The 411 On Mommy

2008-10-22T12:29:00.000-07:00

This post is like any magazine you'd find in the check-out line at the grocery store. Purely informational, with no entertainment value.

Mommy has now been home for 1 week. The doctors say she is doing great. Her GVH has responded well to the steroids and they are starting to taper them this week. Which is a very good thing because we are running out of closets and cabinets for her to organize at two o'clock in the morning.

Daddy continues to give her medicine every day through the port in her chest, and he hasn't passed out once. After she is off the steroids, they can stop the medicine through the port.

Mommy has to check her temperature twice a day to make sure she doesn't have a fever. So far, so good. She takes about 30 pills each day for various reasons. But it seems most of the pills are desgined to counteract the side-effects of one of the other pills.

She goes to the doctor once a week. At her check-up yesterday all of her blood counts were looking very good. The transplant appears to have taken and the doctor said yesterday that he is 99.999% sure that ALL of mommy's bone morrow is now made up of Uncle Jerry's stem cells. YEAH UNCLE JERRY!

They are now just keeping an eye out for other manifestations of GVH and making sure she doesn't get an infection. The medicines will continue to supress her immune system for the next year. But hopefully she will be able to get out of the house and around more people in the next few months.

If we are lucky, we have left all the excitement behind us and it will be a gradual improvement until mommy is completely better.

And This Too Shall Pass

2008-10-17T19:22:00.000-07:00

This morning I woke up in time to see Grandma walking out the door. She said she was going to the airport and would be gone for the entire weekend. I didn't believe she could actually leave me for that long.

So when it was time for lunch, I got in my chair. But there was no Grandma to feed me.

When it was time for our walk I got in my car, but there was no Grandma to push me.

When it was time for stories I got in my chair, but there was no Grandma to read to me.

When it was time for "The Factor" I got our chairs set up, but I was all alone.

When I soiled myself there was no Grandma to powder my bum.

And when it was tubby time, there was no Grandma to fill the tub.

But worst of all, when it was snuggling time, there was no Grandma to snuggle me.

All I have to say is, Grandma you'd better come back soon or I'm setting these Outback Steakhouse cards on fire!

Don't think I won't do it!

The Great Escape

2008-10-14T20:38:00.000-07:00

Charlie T.: "Grandma, are you sure you don't need my help?"
Grandma: "I'm fine, you can go."
Charlie T.: "All by myself?"
Grandma: "I'm not riding on the back of that thing again. I'm still picking bugs out of my teeth from the last time."
Charlie T.: "Alright. I'd like a cheese stick ready when I get back."
Grandma: "Yes, master."

So, all by myself, I hopped on my new wheels (thanks Lolo and Lola Lopez) and scooted on up to the hospital to see mommy.

You can imagine my shock when I strolled into her room and found nothing but an empty IV stand with no mommy connected to it.

The IV stand refused to talk, so I dashed out of the room and into the hallway just in time to see mommy crawl out from under the food cart and make a dash for the door.

She saw me and waved. The mask made it hard to tell what she was saying, but it sounded an awful lot like, "Set yourself on fire if that's what it takes to distract the nurses, I'm outta here!"

Luckily, "Oprah" was on, so no such heroics were required. I slipped out the way I came in and climbed back on Barack (that's what I named my bike - 'cause even when the battery's spent, it just keeps on giving) and raced home.

And there she was, chillin' in on her bed. She says she likes this room much better than her old room. And this one doesn't smell like the inside of a Clorox bottle.

WELCOME HOME MOMMY!

And don't forget to take your medicines.

Yes, that means mommy has reacted well to the steroids. Her liver appears to be okay and the rash is slowly subsiding. She will need to continue with the steroids for a couple of months, but everyone is hopeful that this acute bout of GVH is over and there won't be anything chronic.

Unfortunately, even though mommy is home, she is still unable to have many visitors because of her suppressed immune system. But she still loves email. jenniferwahlquist@comcast.net

Life On The Juice

2008-10-12T20:04:00.000-07:00

You may want to turn down the volume on your computer. I'm leaving the Rash song because it is still applicable, and it makes me giggle.

While mommy didn't need steroids to grow her own breasts, they have proved useful in combating the GVH. Although the rash looked much worse this morning, the doctor said it is responding just like it is supposed to. He said the liver is responding as well.

Here is mommy's back. The rash is also on her tummy, neck, head, arms and legs. Needless to say, it is quite itchy.

They are going to try and switch her to oral steroids tomorrow. We're hoping that the steroids, along with every one's continued prayers, will get mommy through this GVH episode and home in a couple of days.

The steroids have already inspired her to start training for her next big challenge.

I think she'll do great.

Can't We All Just Get Along?

2008-10-10T11:49:00.000-07:00

Just when we thought mommy's cells and Uncle Jerry's cells were playing nice together...

One of the criteria for mommy coming home is that she not have any graft-versus-host disease (GVH).

T-cells are one type of blood cell that mommy has been trying to regrow. They fight off foreign things in the body. GVH happens when mommy's new T-cells (who think they are still partying inside Uncle Jerry) recognize mommy as a foreign body and attack her.

Unfortunately, it looks like that has happened with mommy. She has what they are calling a Grade 1 skin rash over 25% of her foreign body (she is Filipino, you know).

They are hoping they can control it with some steroid cream. If not, she will need to get it through the IV.

So, no date for coming home yet.

The Little Neutrophil That Could

2008-10-08T12:11:00.000-07:00

As I am sure everyone remembers, neutrophils are the white cells that attack bacteria. Here are some bacteria caught in a neutrophil web. (Or, it could be a jelly fish eating some Good-N-Plenties.)

Anyway, we have all been waiting for mommy's new bone marrow to start re-making neutrophils. She started out with one. (That's the little purple guy in the middle of all the red cells)

Well, today she reached 500! Yeah mommy!

That means she is officially engrafted!

So, today they are unhooking all of mommy's IV lines (including Fabio) and she has to take all her medicines by mouth.

If she can get all her pills down, eat enough food, avoid any graft-versus-host disease, and maintain her neutrophils above 500 for two days, then she gets to go home.

This is excellent news. However, since she still feels pretty lousy, I thought it would be a good idea to find a mascot that could do cheers and keep her motivated during the tough times.

Unfortunately, I don't get much of an allowance yet. But this little guy was suprisingly affordable.

Go Team!

Out With The Old, In With The New

2008-10-06T20:32:00.000-07:00

Mommy has now started making new cells again. Her platelets are at normal levels and the other cells are working hard to catch up. Yesterday she had 90 neutrophils, today she had 130. When she has 500 for two days in a row she gets to come home.

The problem with trying to engraft new bone marrow is that it hurts. The pain has forced mommy to make some tough decisions about her friends.

This is mommy with her "old" best friend.

Nice guy, but couldn't do much about the pain. This didn't make mommy smile.

This is mommy's "new" best friend. The morphine pump. Or, as mommy calls it, "Fabio."

Fabio makes mommy smile.

I wonder if Fabio will take me to a baseball game.

A Birthday Poem, by Charlie T.

2008-10-04T22:56:00.000-07:00

Woke yesterday and ate real quick, 'cause with my mom had a bone to pick.

One year ago in a hospital room, she rudely pushed me from her womb.

"What will she try this year?" I said, and found she'd pushed all hair from head.

Despite her bald and stubly way, I got a hug for my birthday.

Grandma "W" the day made great, by baking me a chocolate cake.

We love the hospital at the "U", but dare not bring in my cake of blue.

So, back at home we made a plan, and brought mom in with a web-cam.

She watched as naked to my waste, a bit of frosting I did taste.

I got some presents and a balloon, but mostly want my mom home soon.

To mom I say while cake I'm lovin', "thanks for cookin' me in your oven!"

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

2008-09-29T21:03:00.000-07:00

Mommy is 10 days old today, and has been in the hospital for two weeks. As you can see, it didn't take her long to learn how to crochet. I don't know who's name we have for Christmas this year, but I hope they have a lot of heads.

While mommy has been gone, I have been spending way too much time with my sisters.

But, at least I've had time to learn a little bit of yoga.

I believe this is called "tooting in a wind storm."

Mommy reached a bit of a milestone today. Her hair started falling out in clumps.

Not wanting to wait for it to fall out in her bed, she made an appointment with a world famous head shaver and made a preemptive strike.

Mommy before...

Mommy after...

So, Uncle Phillip, don't be alarmed if you visit and my daddy makes a pass at you, he may be a little confused for a while.

La Cucaracha - NOT!

2008-09-27T14:24:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have been waiting for the latest update on mommy, here it is.

She is feeling quite lousy most of the time, but that is how it is supposed to be. The chemo therapy has destroyed most of her bone marrow and Uncle Jerry's stem cells are doing some remodeling before they move in. Unfortunately, it is slow going.

Apparently, there was only one construction worker in the group of stem cells that Uncle Jerry gave to her. I'm sure she'll find a use for the policeman, the soldier and the U of U grad, but I don't know what she'll do with the cowboy and Indian.

So, right now, mommy's insides look like the "Big Dig."

For example, each of us have little infection fighting cells called neutrophils floating around in our blood stream. We have anywhere from 2,500 to 7,500 neutrophil cells in each micro liter of our blood. Mommy has zero.

A while ago, my ridiculously generous father took my sisters and I to see the movie Wall-E.

As you know, the premise of the movie is that the lazy humans have destroyed the earth and are now living in space. Wall-E is a little robot that was left on earth to compact and stack the trash. The only thing still living on earth is a single cockroach, because, as we all know, cockroaches are invincible.

If the indestructible cockroach is on one end of the health spectrum, mommy is currently on the other. This is necessary so her blood won't attack Uncle Jerry's construction worker stem cell and prevent the necessary remodeling.

We'll know when Uncle Jerry's stem cells have engrafted when they start making their own neutrophils. This will hopefully start in the next week or so.

In addition to the low neutrophils, mommy is also low on platelets and red blood cells. She got two transfusions of red cells today and one bag of platelets.

A few days ago we were worried that one of the medicines had damaged mommy's liver, but the enzymes they measure for liver damage are going down each day, so it appears that everything will be okay in that regard.

Because of all the construction going on inside her body, mommy was having quite a bit of bone pain the other day. So, she tried some oxycodone. It helped somewhat with the pain, but she had wacky hallucinations with it. She actually thought she heard one of the presidential candidates promise to cut taxes for 95 percent of Americans while increasing spending on health care, education, and police. Yeah right, mommy!

Squeeze Cheese

2008-09-26T10:17:00.001-07:00

I realized the other day that I really miss my mommy and that I probably hadn't really taken the time to let her know how it makes me feel when she holds me.

I wanted to take that opportunity now.

Gas, Food and Lodging

2008-09-23T15:46:00.000-07:00

If you are relatively new to this blog, please see the intructions to the right before proceeding.

Apparently, chemotherapy messes with one's sense of taste and smell. Mommy has been having a hard time stomaching the hospital food. So, she had daddy bring in a bunch of frozen dinners. As long as it is pre-packaged, it is okay for mommy to eat. The real problem seems to be that mommy isn't hungry very often.

When she is able to eat, she usually just likes a can of baked beans and some potato chips.

It's no wonder she isn't hungry much. She now has six bags of stuff constantly running in through her port. This is the "tree of life" that she drags with her everywhere she goes.

Here she is doing her twice daily 1/18th of a mile walk around the Bone Marrow Transplant wing.

Here she's riding the exercise bike in her room.

Speaking of rooms. Yesterday mommy was moved to a much nicer room inside the enclosed BMT wing. Because they were so crowded, mommy had been in a room a few doors down from the actual BMT wing. It was still a positive pressure room (meaning when the door is opened the air is sucked out of the room, rather than in, so that no germs come in) but it was not as nice as the rooms in the BMT wing and it was not as secure as far as keeping out unclean visitors, etc.

This is mommy's new room.

It has a desk, big fold out chairs for daddy, and a flat screen TV. Here's mommy sitting at her desk checking her emails today. jenniferwahlquist@comcast.net.

Yesterday, mommy got a dose of some glowing, yellow stuff called Methotrexate. It was her second of three doses. The Methotrexate is supposed to help prevent graft-versus-host disease. Unfortunately, in Asians, it is known to cause liver damage. This morning, she found out that the drug had affected her liver, so she might not be able to get the third dose she was supposed to get in a couple of days.

Overall, mommy is doing fairly well. She is nauseous quite a bit of the time, but they are able to give her drugs to help her feel a little bit better.

As the nurse is always saying, "the doctor insists that everyone is healthy before they're broken."

Hint: Pit of Despair

Time To Meet The Team.

2008-09-21T16:17:00.000-07:00

This is Richard, one of the nurses. He has eight cats and a turtle.

Richard claims he was at a Landmark meeting when he learned he was the love child of Nancy Sinatra and placed for adoption. He didn't know who the father was. But....

My Uncle Jason is involved in Landmark. Hmmmmm..... Anything you want to talk about Uncle Jason?

This is a picture of Dr. Boyer (the transplant doctor), Richard (the nurse), mommy (the diseased), Charlie (the Nurse Practitioner), and Dr. Howser (the chief of staff).

Dr. Boyer works two hours a day, never wears anything resembling what a doctor is supposed to wear, and doesn't think anything my dad says is funny.

Charlie has a speach impedement, but says she is from Sweden. I think she only said that so my doofus dad wouldn't feel bad about asking where she was from when he heard her talk. Yes, she is wearing sandles.

Dr. Howser, is clearly the brains of the operation, although sometimes it seems his genius is more of a curse than a blessing.

This is Elma, another nurse. She says she is from Thailand. My dad isn't sure if she is telling the truth or if she has a speech impedement too. Elma's mommy had cancer and had to empty her own potty in the hospital. Mommy doesn't have to empty her own potty.

This is DawnaMarie. Her daughter took violin lesson until the teacher yelled at her. Then she decided she didn't like the violin anymore. DawnaMarie thinks mommy needs to eat more of her dinner.

This is my Grandpa Brent who drove 6 hours from Las Vegas (where he was supposed to be at a very important meeting) to see my mommy in the hospital.

Oh, wait...that's not the hospital. That's the sidelines at the BYU v. Wyoming game yesterday.

Don't worry Grandpa, mommy's doing fine.

They Say Forty Is The New Zero

2008-09-19T19:27:00.000-07:00

Today is day "zero!" That means mommy gets infused with Uncle Jerry's stems cells. The day started with Uncle Jerry being hooked up to this fancy-pancy machine that sucks the blood out of him and separates the stem cells.

This is the bag filling with the stem cells (that red goo is the actual stuff mommy will get). Uncle Jerry was so productive (he gave over 10 million cells both yesterday and today) that they had enough left over to freeze for future use.

This is Uncle Jerry trying to convince the cute nurse that he needed a catheter. She gave him an empty mason jar.

This is Richard, the nurse, presenting mommy with the fresh stem cells.

Here's the two blood swappers, sharing an embrace before uncle Jerry came back to the house and passed out.

With the new stems cells inside of her, mommy celebrated her new birthday! She is officially Zero today!

I brought my posse to the hospital to celebrate.

Happy New Birthday Mommy!

A Series of Uneventful Events

2008-09-16T19:46:00.000-07:00

Uncle Jerry got here Sunday night and got his first shot Monday morning.

On the other side of the room, mommy was getting her third day of chemo.

Tuesday's Happenings.

9:30am: Mommy gets settled into her room.

10:00am: Mommy gets hooked up to the machine and started on a new type of chemo.

10:01am: the machine stands outside the bathroom.

10:10am: Mommy starts her new hobby of crocheting.

10:15am: the machine stands outside the bathroom.

10:16am: Mommy works on her third cup (of what would end being fifty-seven) of ice to reduce mouth sores from the chemo.

10:20am: the machine stands outside the bathroom.

Meanwhile, back at home...

I was rocking out with Uncle Jerry.

Clara was cooking dinner in the back yard.

So far, nothing terribly eventful. Mommy is doing great. Although it is difficult to have visitors, mommy loves getting emails. Her address is jenniferwahlquist@comcast.net.

I'm sure she will try and respond when she gets a moment.

He Is The Wind Beneath Her Wings

2008-09-11T19:54:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't recall the unfortunate hospital home-teaching incident of several years ago, I will give you a short refresher.

My heroic father went to visit a sick woman who was in the ICU. The exhausted husband was relieved when my Dad showed up and he quickly fell asleep in a nearby chair, leaving my Dad to stand alone and stare at the sedated and intubated woman. Within a few moments the woman started to writhe around on the bed as the sedation was wearing off and she decided she was uncomfortable with a garden hose stuck down her throat.

My father's distance from the bed increased in direct proportion to the woman's level of thrashing about. A nurse came in the room, but apparently she was without any opposable thumbs because she was struggling to connect the new bag of sedation to the IV. The thrashing increased and the level of oxygen to my Dad's brain decreased.

It was not long before my Dad found himself backed against the opposite wall, while only retaining about half his ability for vision.

As the tunnel of light continued to decrease, my Dad stumbled to the door and out into the hallway. Feeling along the wall, he found what he thought was a chair, but it was unfortunately not empty. With only a tiny pin-hole of light left in his eyes, he spotted the nurses desk not far away. As the darkness consumed him he moved toward the desk.

At this point, my mommy, who was waiting down in the cafeteria, heard the announcement for a "Code Blue in ICU" come over the intercom. She thought to herself, "oh no, that poor woman Todd went to visit."

My Dad woke up to find several nurses pulling his shirt off. Anxious to see how that dream ended, he quickly went back to sleep. He awoke a few minutes later (disappointed no doubt) on a gurney being pushed into the elevator. His next memory is waking up in the emergency room as Mommy yelled at him for being such a wimp and stealing the attention from the woman in the ICU. She was not at all sympathetic to the fact that Daddy fractured his skull and had such deep abrasions on his face that he didn't have to shave there for about six months.

You are probably asking yourself, "why is Charlie T wasting cyber space with this tired story?"

I will tell you. Because my Daddy has come a long way since that day in the ICU.

WARNING - THE PHOTOS BELOW MIGHT MAKE YOU FALL AND FRACTURE YOUR SKULL IF YOU ARE A WIMP!

Last night, mommy had a tube stuck in her jugular vein. Ordinarily, not a big deal. Except that they leave part of it sticking out of her chest.

What you can't see (because it was a bit too low, if you know what I mean) is that there are three little tube endings hanging off the little white space shuttle looking thing that crash landed in mommy's boob.

This is the part where my Daddy qualified for his super-hero cape and mask. He actually flushed one of the little tubes with heparin to clean it out. He did this under nurse supervision in the office because he has to flush all three little tubes at home tomorrow.

That's right! No head injuries!

A few changes to yesterday's post with regard to schedule. Mommy won't start chemo until Saturday and won't be admitted to the hospital until Tuesday. They pushed things back a day so they could suck the stems cells from Uncle Jerry for two days instead of one.

Also, the engraftment won't actually take place until days 14 to 21.

A note on day counting:

Mommy starts chemo on Saturday, that is Day -6 (as in minus six). Sunday is day -5, and so forth. She gets infused on Friday, which will be Day 0. From there they start counting up until day 100. At that point, the risk of serious graft versus host disease will hopefully be in the rear-view mirror and we can stop counting days.

In Case You Missed It

2008-09-08T19:04:00.000-07:00

I am assuming that most of you have some viewing taste, and therefore, missed my recent interview on "The Factor."

Since I discussed some important issues, I thought I should re-produce the transcript so you wouldn't miss any information.

Bill: "Thanks for coming on 'The Factor' Charlie T. I've always thought you were a stand-up guy."

Charlie T. "You're welcome Bill. I've always thought you were a pompous jerk."

Bill: "Don't be a suck-up Charlie T, you're better than that. Let's get to it. You're here to discuss your mom's upcoming bone-marrow transplant."

Charlie T: (grimaces)

Bill: "Go ahead, let's here what you have to say."

Charlie T: (grimaces)

Bill: "What are you doing?"
Charlie T: "I just pooped."
Bill: "What!?"

Charlie T: "I'm a baby Bill, relax."
Bill: "You can't...."
Charlie T: "It's the 'no spin zone' Bill. At least I didn't spin."
Bill: "Just tell the people what you want to say."

Charlie T: "I need a snack."
Bill: "What?"

Charlie T: "You said there would be time for a snack."

Bill: "Not in the middle of the interview."

Charlie T: "I'm a baby Bill, I need a snack."

Bill: "Fine, have your snack."

Charlie T: "I need your help."

Bill: "With what?...Oh, c'mon Charlie! Are those nipples?"

Charlie T: "I'm a..."

Bill: "A baby, yeah I know. Stop reminding me. Let's get this over with."

Bill: "Do you always eat in your underwear?"

Charlie T: "Don't you?"

Bill: "Wrap it up already."

Charlie T: "I'm good. Next time I want it a bit warmer."

Bill: "Please get dressed and get off my desk."

Charlie T: "Fine, let's get this over with."

Bill: "Go ahead."

Charlie T: "Which camera do I look at?"

Bill: "It doesn't matter, no body's watching."

Charlie T: "My grandma is."

Bill: "Really?"

Charlie T: "No, you're just background noise while she quilts."

Bill: "Please just say what you have to say."

Charlie T: "Is this a good earnest look for me?"

Bill: "It's great."

Charlie T: "Do I have time for a quick nap?"

Bill: "I'm firing who ever it is that booked you for this show."

Charlie T: "I'm..."

Bill: "Don't tell me you're a baby! I know where you live and so help me..."

Charlie T: "Okay, fine. My mom goes in tomorrow (Wednesday) and they will put a port in her chest."

Charlie T: "Except mommy won't wear a sleeveless top."

Bill: "That's comforting."

Charlie T: "Then she will meet with the transplant doctor on Thursday. On Friday, she will start chemotherapy. She will go to the hospital and get chemo through the port on Friday, Saturday and Sunday."

Bill: "What about church?"

Charlie T: "No can do, Cracker Jack. It'll be months before she's back at church. Uncle Jerry flies in Sunday night. Then mommy will be admitted to the hospital on Monday. She gets more chemo on Monday and Tuesday. Wednesday is a "day off."
Bill: "What will she do that day?"
Charlie T: "She'll throw-up, Bill. Then on Thursday she will get infused with Uncle Jerry's stem cells."

Bill: "How does that work?"
Charlie T: "They collect the stem cells from Uncle Jerry's blood stream and then infuse them through the port in mommy's chest."
Bill: "Then what?"
Charlie T: "Then she will continue to get medications to suppress her immune system so it doesn't attack and destroy Uncle Jerry's stem cells."

Bill: "How long does that take?"

Charlie T: "It takes about 10 to 14 days for the cells to 'engraft' and start re-building the immune system. At that point, Uncle Jerry's cells should take over the marrow. It will then recognize mommy's mutation manufacturing cells as the foreign body and destroy it. She will be in the hospital for about 4 to 8 weeks. When she gets home she will continue with the immune suppressing drugs for several more months. This means she has to be extremely careful and avoid anything or anyone that might get her sick."
Bill: "Then she probably shouldn't eat at that IHOP in Rock Springs anytime soon."
Charlie T: "No Bill, she shouldn't. In fact, she will be severely limited in where she can go, what she can do, and even what she can eat, for quite some time."

Bill: "I'll bet a visit from me would cheer her up during these long months of isolation."

Charlie T: "No Bill, it wouldn't."
Bill: "Why not?"
Charlie T: "Because you're a buffoon Bill. Besides, even if you weren't a buffoon, which you are, visiting is not such a good idea because if you are sick, or around someone who is sick, you could easily spread that to my mommy, and then I would have to gnaw your leg off."
Bill: "oh."

Charlie T: "When you have no immune system, you can't have just anybody popping in to visit."

Charlie T: "Do you have any crackers?"
Bill: "No. We're done here."
Charlie T: "You forgot to burp me."

Bill: "That'll do it for 'The Factor.' I'll see you all tomorrow when I grill Governor Palin's daughter over her decision to deliver one baby while she was 5 months pregnant with another. Good night."

Charlie T: "Aren't you supposed to say, "Stay Classy San Diego?"

Bill: "No, that's not me."

Charlie T: "Are you sure?"

Bill: "Go away."

Charlie T: "You might want to try it. Sounds better than what you're doing now."

Bill: "Please leave."

Charlie T: "Stay Classy San Diego!

Victory!

2008-09-03T12:33:00.000-07:00

For the past week, mommy's infection has been quickly improving, and this morning she went back to the dentist and he gave her the "all clear."

Thank you to everyone who joined us in prayer and support. We are now able to move forward with the transplant process.

Tomorrow, mommy will go back in for the pulmonary function test that she was unable to complete because of the mouth surgeries. Hopefully, daddy has learned to sit quietly and keep his suggestions to himself.

Next Monday, mommy and daddy will go to the hospital for "transplant education."

"Charlie T?...Charlie T?..."

Near the end of next week, they will meet with the transplant doctor and mommy gets to start the chemotherapy. From what I hear, it will be very similar to a relaxing afternoon at the spa.

Except that she will feel extremely fatigued, throw-up a lot, and lose all her hair.

Then, on the 15th or 16th of September, mommy will go into the hospital. At that point, Uncle Jerry will come out from Virginia and spend about 5 days getting daily shots with a very, very small needle.

Then, for two days they will use some high-tech medical device to suck the stem stells from his blood and put them into mommy.

After that, we sit and wait for Uncle Jerry's stem cells to "Obaminate" mommy's bone marrow and start building a whole new eco-friendly, mutation-free blood manufacturing operation.

That's right. "Change We Can Believe In!"

As always, Charlie T (I've decided to test drive the practice of referring to myself in the third person, just to see how it goes) will keep you posted.

As many of you know, my Grandma Diana has been here for the past couple of weeks. She is AWESOME! Contrary to what my daddy led us to believe, there are other things at the grocery store besides hot dogs and cheese-sticks.

Obviously, this is a great sacrifice for my grandma and grandpa to be apart for so long. I was worried about grandpa, so I asked him to send a picture, letting us know how he is doing. Apparently he has to eat out a lot more now that grandma isn't around.

What a trooper.

"And So, My Fellow Americans..."

2008-08-27T10:37:00.001-07:00

"Ask not what your Charlie T. can do for you - ask what you can do for your Charlie T."

As you all know, mommy had surgery a couple of weeks ago to clean the infection out of a tooth. This was necessary because when she goes in for the bone marrow transplant, they will wipe out her immune system and she will be unable to fight off any infections.

Unfortunately, the tooth is refusing to give up the infection. In our house we call this "bad choosing."

This is a problem because the doctors can't schedule the transplant until they get the okay from the dentist, and the dentist won't give the okay until the infection is gone. They think it might take two or three weeks. Mommy can't wait that long.

This is where you, the loyal Charlie T-ites, come in.

I am asking that you all join us in prayer and ask a special blessing to help the infection in mommy's mouth go away quickly.

If prayer is new to you, don't worry. Just get on a couple of your knees and do your best.

We are very grateful for all the love and support that has been shared over the past couple of weeks since mommy's genes came out of the closet. Thank you in advance for joining us in this little battle against the evil tooth. For those of you who are afraid of battle, just let me know and I will come slap you.

Carry on.

It's Always Darkest Just Before It Goes Totally Black

2008-08-21T14:46:00.000-07:00

Apparently all of mommy's doctors got together and decided she wasn't miserable enough. They felt that in order to truly enjoy the bone marrow transplant, she would need to have some dental work done first.

So, last Thursday she had some ridiculously invasive procedure called an apicoectomy where they cut away at the roots of one of her teeth and left her with five stitches in her mouth.

Then yesterday, she went to another "dentist" who yanked out a tooth on the other side of her mouth with what looked like a pair of Craftsman pliers. It's a good thing mommy loves Jell-O and mashed potatoes.

Today, she went for a bunch of pre-transplant tests. They did an echo cardiogram and an EKG. They were also going to do a pulmonary function test, but because of all the dental work mommy refused to put the mouthpiece into her mouth. My daddy suggested she try it anyway.

I believe it was the combination of my daddy being firmly seated in a chair and the cat-like reflexes of the technician that prevented the tubing from being employed in a way that would have rendered it unusable for future lung tests. However, mommy's mouth must have felt a little bit better because she was able to use it to say lots of words I hadn't heard before. They rescheduled that test for another day.

Then they told mommy they needed to draw a little blood. (No joke, these are the actual vials!)

About halfway through I was afraid mommy's mouth was going to start feeling better again. (Don't get out of your seat blond lady!)

They got all the blood they needed at about the same time daddy carefully slid out of his chair and onto the floor for a little nap.

Uncle Jerry is flying here tonight so that he can get his donor physical tomorrow. I can't wait to see his face when he finds out how much blood he has to give!

JAK'D UP

2008-08-13T14:06:00.000-07:00

This is a story about jacked up jeans.

I mean JAK'D up genes.

Once upon a time (about 15 years ago) a mutation, the JAK2V617F mutation, (affectionately known as JAK2) occurred in my mommy's bone marrow. And, as we all know, the marrow is where the blood cells are made.

The JAK2 mutation caused mommy's marrow to make too many platelets. These cute little guys are responsible for clotting whenever we start to bleed.

JAK2 gave mommy a disease called essential thrombocythemia. In order to prevent complications from clotting (heart attack, stroke, etc.) she was put on various medications. These medications reduced the number of platelets by destroying cells in the marrow. Unfortunately, the drugs also prevented her from being able to get pregnant, so she and daddy went to the store and got these.

Well, after taking these medications for nearly fifteen years, they started making mommy feel pretty crummy. The last medicine she was on, interferon, was pretty heavy-duty and was known to be effective for several months after you stop taking it. So, she stopped getting the daily shots and thankfully her platelet count stayed normal. She was in remission! Yeah! With the medication problem temporarily out of the way mommy and daddy called the doctor and asked about getting pregnant. The doctor said "sure" and two minutes later...Voila!

All through the pregnancy mommy's platelets stayed normal (yeah me!) and mommy felt great (except when I kicked her bladder). A few months later, Voila again!

Unfortunately, after I came along, mommy started feeling crummy again. But it wasn't her platelets this time, it was her red blood cells. These guys are supposed to carry oxygen around the body.

Instead of making too many platelets, her marrow was not making enough red cells. This caused her to be anemic, which resulted in her being very, very, very tired. So, off to the doctor we went, and Mr. Bone Marrow Biopsy No. 8 revealed that mommy's disease had changed.

Unlike in the picture above, the doctors couldn't get any liquid out of mommy's marrow at all. The marrow had become so fibrotic (gunked up) that it couldn't do it's job. It was having a hard time making any of the different blood cells.

The good news was that mommy no longer had essential thrombocythemia.

The bad news was that she now had myelofibrosis (a.k.a. agnogenic myeloid metaplasia).

The good news was that a different type of interferon might help un-gunk the marrow.

The bad news was that the medicine would cost $3,500 a month and the insurance would not pay for it.

The good news was that the manufacturer finally agreed to provide the medicine for 24 months for free. (Yeah Schering Corp!)

The bad news was that, according to the doctors, mommy wouldn't be around for 24 months without a permanent cure.

The good news was that there is a cure.

The bad news was that the only cure is a bone marrow transplant.

The good news was that, while we were at the beach,

We learned that Uncle Jerry...

... is a perfect match (only 25% chance of having a sibling that actually matches you) and that he would be able to donate his bone marrow. (Yeah Uncle Jerry!) The bad news is that Uncle Jerry rides a motorcycle.

Since coming home from the beach mommy has tried the medication to see if it would help her feel better. But after several weeks mommy has continued to feel lousy and her blood is not responding well. In fact, her blood counts were so low on Monday that they had to giver her a shot to increase her white blood cells, a shot to increase her hematocrit, a transfusion of two units of red blood cells, and a transfusion of two units of platelets (there's irony for you!). A great way to kill 6 hours of your day.

So, after several hundred blood draws, fifteen years of feeling lousy, eight bone marrow biopsies, five chemo therapy drugs, four blood transfusions, one enlarged spleen, and a partridge in a pear tree, it was decided today that she would move forward with the bone marrow transplant at the Huntsman Cancer Institute associated with the school up north.

We don't know all the particulars yet, but it will likely be at the beginning of September. She has to get some dental work done first (to eliminate any sources of infection) and she needs to have a battery of tests done.

Also, arrangements need to be made for selling my sisters and I on eBay.

Once we get started, mommy will spend about 6 weeks in the hospital and then will live in the proverbial plastic bubble for 2 to 6 months after that. If all goes well, she should be "cured" in about a year.

All things considered, we are not big fans of the JAK2 mutation. But, I'm sure we all remember the mutation that resulted in my dad going to film school...

...and we managed to recover from that. So, we have every intention of kicking this mutation's little rear-end.

This has all happened very quickly and we are still finding our way through this maze, but now that things are moving quickly towards the transplant we wanted to let our family and friends know what was going on.

For those of you who are bugged that you didn't know anything until now, don't be. You are in good company. I will try and keep you posted as things progress, at least up until the time I am shipped off to the highest bidder with a PayPal account.

Things I Overheard At The Beach

2008-07-22T17:23:00.000-07:00

Amelia: "Uncle Kent and Adam, are you sure this is a good idea?"

Amelia: "Adam you coward, let go of me and take your hand off Uncle Kent's head!"

Uncle Marc: "Adam, we said 'no dunks,' not, 'no trunks.'"

Dad: "No, I'm not giving you pointers, she's my sister for goodness sake!"

Cousin Ella: "I know he's a lawyer, but we both agree he's a better daddy. I'll still see you at reunions."

Ladies on the beach: "Who are those weenies stealing Charlie T's wave?"

Grandma: "Back off ladies, he's all mine."

Aunt Kenna: "Help yourselves ladies, and yes, that is real hair on his shoulders."

Paparazzi: "Who's that holding Charlie T? It's Gwenyth! No it's Uma!"

Grandma: "If I had it to do over again, I would have stopped after your Dad."

We Had Joy, We Had Fun, We Had Seasons In The Sun

2008-07-18T12:11:00.000-07:00

A Summer Poem
By Charlie T.

The sun was hot, the pool got lame.

So, packed my bags and took a plane.

Spent time with Mommy's family,

Went to the beach and to D.C.

The ladies swarmed to watch my Dad,

For Uncle Jason...well, that's just sad.

I rose each morning to meditate,

Then for my breakfast, some sand I ate.

Watched fireworks from on The Mall,

With Dad and Uncles, played football.

Talked some smack with Cousin Mary,

Pretended Grandma wasn't scary.

To Mary, Grandpa gave my squeeze,

So, in his chair I cut the cheese.

Oh Hail, It's The Chief!

2008-05-28T12:00:00.000-07:00

So, I wake up this morning, thinking its going to be another great day to be me. As I'm laying there on the changing table with my ankles high in the air getting my bumper powered, I look out the window to see that an ominous mist of darkness has descended upon my city.

I asked myself, "what unholy force could bring such despair?" So, I hopped in my stroller and went downtown to see if I could get to the bottom of this.

As I am wheeling through town I hear, "Charlie T! Charlie T!"

Apparently he's in town on a money grab for the guy that beat the snot out of the guy that used the Olympics to jump start his political career. He yells to me, "Charlie T, come listen to me read a piece of paper with really big words on it."

I figure, what the heck. I've got ten minutes and $70,000 to burn. So, I follow him over to the Grand America Hotel and we go into the ballroom full of supporters.

Ouch!

Turns out there weren't enough high-rollers to fill the ballroom, so they moved the gathering to a residential neighborhood where "W" could have a little more one-on-one time with his biggest fan.

Welcome to Salt Lake City!

By the way, at seventy thousand bucks a pop, you might want to consider upgrading the door prizes.

2008-05-26T20:53:00.001-07:00